knot4u
Repeat Offender
Were you responsible for the gear pins when you flew 135? If you say "No" you're lying.
Douchey Pilot Things. A list
- Thread starter ahw01
- Start date
ChasenSFO
hen teaser
At one point, a few consecutive F9 crews rolling into the ramp at 1AM (we had 3-4 redeyes a few years ago from SFO and I want to say 21-24 flights) had reacted to the amazing facts or the amazing sounds the animal on the tail makes negatively enough that I didn't do it for about a week. I remember saying "And be advised sir, 'Captain' the Puffin on the tail can live to be 70 years old and meets annually with his mate in the Arctic each summer before they part ways again". He sounded pissed and went, "Yeah that's just great, that's what I needed. I'll be sure to forget that before I even get to the van for you". After that, I only stopped for about a week before I got frequent complaints from F9 crews asking, "Hey, why aren't we getting animal facts?" like it was owed to them LOL. So then I just kept it up whenever the situation allowed for it, and my coworker joined in too so it was 7 nights per week more or less. Some of them would respond to the fact with, "Ok, and what noise does it make?". "Standby...". One pilot did back-to-back SFO redeyes, and on the first one was told some kind of fact about the Western Chipmunk that was surely PG-rated. The next night, the same pilot in the same A320 rolls up and doesn't even call up with a callsign, just goes, "Ahoy Ramp Commander, the Western Chipmunk mates twice per year, and the Eastern Chipmunk mates once per year. I know which one I'd be. And we're going to gate 22". We were dying. It became a running joke with him the rest of my time there.
Before you knew it, Virgin Atlantic, Cathay Pacific, and Korean Air even were joining in with their own amazing animal facts for Frontier. A few Hawaiian captains lived in the Bay Area and bid SFO all the time and pretty much sparked off antics whenever they came home. It was good times and made overnight shifts (where people good at their job get held hostage) tolerable.
I was really cool with the Southwest ramp supervisors who did the repositions at night in lieu of mechanics like most carriers, and we'd mess with new rampers on the tug or new sups in the cockpit. Often times I was able to just hold them in the ramp for 30-90 minutes and avoid having them do a tow across the airport then go back out and get the plane again, and often times they'd be holding with 1-2 Frontier planes waiting for the 1 gate (out of 3) that the company ever used for the 4 redeyes because...Trego Dugan. When the tow-back gates would re-open, I'd hit them with something like "Do you have the A319 off your right, named 'Eccles the Ermine' in sight?". They'd be a little confused and then I'd tell them "Ok, that is an Ermine, it is a member of the weasel family. Hold position, advise when you have some Ermine facts for me". Then I'd seriously just work traffic for a few minutes while the supervisor in the cockpit taught them resources for finding animal facts and distinguishing ones interesting enough to say on the air. They'd be so flustered, they'd come back all confidently like, "Ramp. Ermine fact". Very definitively, as if they were on the cusp of announcing they've cured AIDS. Then they'd rattle one-off and by that time their alley was usually clearing up and they'd roll on in thinking they saved the day. Very often the Southwest pilots coming in on the RONs would join in and figure out what we were doing. Sadly, not once do I recall a Frontier crew saying anything about this "game". Though I never asked, just worked them like normal traffic after LOL.
It seemed like Frontier was a pretty cool place to work from what I saw. And "Volaris". And this one Japanese carrier that transited SFO often but I never figured out which after my many conversations with its crews. What is probably my favorite story involves Sheldon the Sea Turtle and one fun F9 crew. Ask me sometime.
zmiller4
Well-Known Member
poser765
Well-Known Member
Jesus this was beautiful.
Skåning
Well-Known Member
zmiller4
Well-Known Member
Well I guess we know what the pay disparity between a 787 and 737 captain is!
I want to see “CRJ CAPT”. Probably on a 2009 Altima.
Roger Roger
Bottom of the list
Someone at FSI Tucson has a license plate that says AT VREF
Cherokee_Cruiser
Bronteroc
It’s not my job. Those lineman were supposed to take them out. An air return isn’t my fault. I didn’t leave those gear pins in, they did.
EIR
It's 5 o'clock somewhere
He's referring to 91/135 ops. In this case, it definitely is the crews responsibility to remove them.
Even at an airline, this is an item that is looked at during the walk around. So, if you do an air return, who is ultimately responsible? I'm willing to bet the ACP/CP will not agree with you that it's not your responsibility.
Cherokee_Cruiser
Bronteroc
If a pilot doesn’t drink its completely fine. I used to say “if a pilot doesn’t drink…” then I actually thought about what I was saying and about my friends that don’t drink then realized I need to think about phrases I jokingly use without much thought.
Temperance, or lack thereof, is as important to me as boxers or briefs.
Temperance, or lack thereof, is as important to me as boxers or briefs.
EIR
It's 5 o'clock somewhere
So, you pull the joke card when you realize how idiotic your post was? Got it.
Keep those fantastic jokes coming.
roundout
VNAV monitor
Denver Flying Club. IYKYK.
edited to add: this is literally why we can’t have nice things
trafficinsight
Well-Known Member
Minuteman
I HAVE STRONG OPINIONS ABOUT AUTOMOTIVE LIGHTING!
zmiller4
Well-Known Member
Oh man. Former dog was a dock- tailed boxer and of course we have photos like this.
Current dog is a boxer/pit rescue with a full tail that precludes boxer-ass-face photos.
Cherokee_Cruiser
Bronteroc
what are these boxers and briefs you speak of.....?
The worse part is, the likely sheer number of pilots who applied for this license plate personalization with the DMV, and were denied because it’s already taken.
