People...

Doug Taylor said:
The next group of passengers come out and this old man says, (and remember, put this into a Lars 'n Jurg from Wisconsin voice) "Hey YOOO. I don't know what dag gum flight school you went to there hey, but YOO do NAAT stand in DA arc of DA PRAP until the captain puts the keys on DA dashboard so YOOO KNOOO da MAGnetoes are AAAAF there buster."

I said, "Thank you sir, I stand corrected" and tried my best not to laugh.

Yah sure hey, you bethcha, DOOn't ya KNOOO. Me and Jurg going down to da ice sheck for a skosh of beer, hey!
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Hey, now. Just because someone's from da nord doesn't mean they're stupit. Jeesu cripe!
-C.
 
Nah, the WI accent was just for effect! :)

Folks up Nort' der are smart, real smart hey!
 
You know what's kind of funny? It's the wannabes who are the biggest bungholes. It's never the big time people who are bungholes, it's the people who wish they were big time but aren't.

When you're driving around a Bentley that costs more than the much tossed around media figure for compensation for a 747 captain, you know you are the man. You don't need to cop an attitude or act like a prick to prove it.

However, if you can barely afford the payments on your Lexus and you're in a world of hurt because interest rates are going up and you can't make those McMansion payments, then you've got to prove you're "big time." Never mind that by being a prick you show you aren't. You think you are.

Yesterday, as I was flying back from DEN, this bunghole turns to an FA who was taking care of feeding an unaccompanied minor and says, hey, when are you going to serve drinks?

Everyone just stared at him. After the FA walked away, he said to the guy next to him that he just made premier and that the crew needed to be nicer to him.

I'm just sitting there thinking, was I that much of a bunghole when I made premier for the first time?
 
flying back from MHT to DTW the other day there was a decent amount of turbulance - enough that the FA's had to stay strapped in. People next to me started pitching a fit cause they weren't getting their drinks and $1 trail mix. I told them that it didn't matter if they got their pop cause it'd get spilled all over them anyway the next time the plane hit a bump :insane:
 
Tim said:
A friend of a friend use to fly the EMB-110 and he told us they were on approach into ATL one night and some asian tourist (not discrimintating) pulled the divider/curtain back and as they were just over the threshold he snaps of several pics...with the flash.....needless to say they both had looked at the idiot when the flash went off. He said lucky for them between the 2 of them they got the vision enough back to see...He told us he wanted to punch this guys lights out...
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I hear they call that "Japanese Lightning!"
 
TheShortOne said:
flying back from MHT to DTW the other day there was a decent amount of turbulance - enough that the FA's had to stay strapped in. People next to me started pitching a fit cause they weren't getting their drinks and $1 trail mix. I told them that it didn't matter if they got their pop cause it'd get spilled all over them anyway the next time the plane hit a bump :insane:
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Yeah, and the fact that they are only paying for 5% of what the actual cost of that seat is. . . they better just be happy they have seat cushions and worry about buying their own darn pops and $1 trail mix. Bunch of travelling idiots.
 
I remember one day flying PIT to BUF the FA called up front and warned us about a pax on the taxi. After waiting 30 minutes to deice the weather changes and to freezing rain and we elect to go back to the gate and deplane. A guy in the back give the FA an ear full while deplaning. Upon entering the terminal the guy gets in my face and start calling me an incompentant pilot and that I am scared to fly in a little ice plus several explatives. I calmly explain that we are prohibited from flying in freezing rain and if you notice, all the planes are returing the gates. If you want you are always welcome to drive to BUF. By not yelling at the guy I was really getting under his skin and he turned from me (bright red) and demanded the CSA get his bags and refund his ticket. He also wanted the names of the crew because he was going to write US Airways to tell them how imcompentant we all were and he would never fly them again.

I wonder if he got in an accident trying to drive to Buffalo in an ice storm?

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You will definately meet all types in this industry. I was DHing on flight drinking my Canada Dry when all of a sudden we take one huge shot. My drink and many others get launched to the ceiling. Before I can catch it is all over the lady next me. Other drinks hit the ceiling. Now I am expecting to get an ear full from the lady. I appoligize and offer to pay for the dry cleaning and she is totally nice and said it's no big deal and don't worry about it. I was shocked.
 
Maximillian_Jenius said:
I hear they call that "Japanese Lightning!"
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AAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
Ohhhhh my Sweet Jesus on the Cross that's funny!
I was almost mad at you for making me spew black coffee all over my monitor.
Pure Jenius man, pure Jenius.
That is definitely going in my funny portfolio.
 
Bandit_Driver said:
I remember one day flying PIT to BUF the FA called up front and warned us about a pax on the taxi. After waiting 30 minutes to deice the weather changes and to freezing rain and we elect to go back to the gate and deplane. A guy in the back give the FA an ear full while deplaning. Upon entering the terminal the guy gets in my face and start calling me an incompentant pilot and that I am scared to fly in a little ice plus several explatives. I calmly explain that we are prohibited from flying in freezing rain and if you notice, all the planes are returing the gates. If you want you are always welcome to drive to BUF. By not yelling at the guy I was really getting under his skin and he turned from me (bright red) and demanded the CSA get his bags and refund his ticket. He also wanted the names of the crew because he was going to write US Airways to tell them how imcompentant we all were and he would never fly them again.

I wonder if he got in an accident trying to drive to Buffalo in an ice storm?
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We had a similar problem yesterday. They shut down Charlotte after we pushed and ended up sitting for 2.5 hours waiting to go.

(Side story: We would have made it out before the closed the departure gates but the tug driver forgot to shut our exterior mic door and another plane noticed it just as we were clearing the ramp so we had to pull back into the ramp to have somebody shut it. In doing so we fell back about 6 places for departure and of course they shut down the airport when we were number 6)

Anyhow... After sitting only about 45 minutes the front FA calls up and tells us that some guy is demanding to go back to the gate and he knows about the "Passenger Bill Of Rights". I suppose google's my friend and all but I've never heard of this. Anyhow, we can't move at all anyways as we are blocked in and we have no intention of going back unless we need more gas. He went on for a few minutes I guess until several other passengers told him to shut up. See, there are good people out there too!
 
Our second plane for our EWR flight last night came out of CLT and was struck by lightning, probably from that same storm. When it got to EWR it had a couple of holes on it. so they switch to plane #3.

Holes + airplane = not good
 
BobDDuck said:
After sitting only about 45 minutes the front FA calls up and tells us that some guy is demanding to go back to the gate and he knows about the "Passenger Bill Of Rights". I suppose google's my friend and all but I've never heard of this.
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"You have the right to a cheap ass airfare. All other rights are waved if you accept this right."
 
AHHH thanks for the memories everyone. As a former Flight Attendant for AE, I miss all that passenger ignorance. I used to get so frustrated, I started writing about all the passenger incidents, where thay certainly showed their expertise.:sarcasm:
I called it " I checked my brain at the ticket counter"
for 12 years I heard the same dumb jokes about the baby airplane, and where was it's mommy?Yes it is a baby, it is still learning to fly. "Is it safe?' No, ofcourse not, I have a death wish!
The list is endless. It always amazed me that these people had enough sense to even make it to the airport!!

Oddly enough though, I really do miss it.

Ladi
 
Pretty much the same way they view pilots. Passengers don't remember the good flights were things went off without a hitch, the FA was nice and the plane pulled into the gate on time (if not early). They remember the flight where they were 15 minutes late and got a warm soda from a FA that was mad at the world. The coin has two sides.....
 
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