tonyw
Well-Known Member
A 1.2 mile long line. But hey, we're safe because of it. Because no terrorist would ever think of putting on a suicide vest and hitting the security line.
Looks Like I Picked the Wrong Day To Fly Through Chicago
- Thread starter tonyw
- Start date
ZapBrannigan
Old enough to have watched Wings live on TV.
Great job TSA. Jeez.
amorris311
Well-Known Member
Someone has to have a photo of a dozen smurfs standing around not doing a thing and, three lanes closed.
ComplexHiAv8r
Well-Known Member
ORD wasn't that bad with ceilings down to 400, mist and 4mi vis (reported). We had an extra 10 mins waiting in line to depart but the live was long on the taxiway. I thought they did good to keep it all flowing, but what do I know.
Whoops wrong TSA. MY BAD!
Whoops wrong TSA. MY BAD!
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saxman
Well-Known Member
I made the mistake today of leaving my parents house and commuting out of uniform. The line was non existent but the TSA didn't like my can of sardines. They swabbed it down and the machine flagged it! I got full bag search, a pat down, and they confiscated the can. I've probably been carrying that thing for six months now. Hong Kong, Japan, Mexico, Canada... Great job TSA. Great job.
A Life Aloft
Well-Known Member
I feel your pain, man. They confiscated my tuna.
What's that?
It's tuna.
What's all that liquid?
Ah...it's just a little mayo and lemon juice.
What else is in there?
Ah...... a little onion, green pepper, pickles and black olives.
It's too big.
Too big for what? It's my lunch.
You can't take it.
I haven't eaten in six hours.
What's in there?
Crackers.
You can keep those.
But they go with the tuna.
You can't have the tuna.
But I want the tuna, it's my lunch.
It's too big.
I promise not to start a tuna war with it. I am just going to eat it.
You can keep the crackers.
Look, I'll trade you the crackers for the tuna.
You can't have the tuna.
Can I have at least have the tupperware back?
No.
Do you want my plastic spoon too?
No.
Well I don't need it now, I was going to eat the tuna with it. Here.
I don't want it.
Well neither do I.
You can keep the spoon.
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Luigi
Well-Known Member
It sounded delicious, I'm so sorry..
Maybe the TSA enjoyed it just as much as you would have.
A Life Aloft
Well-Known Member
I am convinced she ate it for lunch. They took one of our FAs chicken salad a few weeks later. Once they take away a man's tuna, what's he left with? Crackers and a damn spoon. I'll never forgive or forget.
"This is war. You're fighting in your own backyard. You're fighting for your family. For them, this is just some place. For us, this is our home. It's up to all of us to fight for it." lol
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ScorpioStinger
Well-Known Member
I took the liberty... to enhance,
Hungry Pilot vs TSA Officer.
TSA: What's that?
PILOT: It's tuna.
TSA: What's all that liquid?
PILOT: Ah...it's just a little mayo and lemon juice.
TSA: What else is in there?
PILOT: Ah...... a little onion, green pepper, pickles and black olives.
TSA: It's too big.
PILOT: Too big for what? It's my lunch.
TSA: You can't take it.
PILOT: I haven't eaten in six hours.
TSA: What's in there?
PILOT: Crackers.
TSA: You can keep those.
PILOT: But they go with the tuna.
TSA: You can't have the tuna.
PILOT: But I want the tuna, it's my lunch.
TSA: It's too big.
PILOT: I promise not to start a tuna war with it. I am just going to eat it.
TSA: You can keep the crackers.
PILOT: Look, I'll trade you the crackers for the tuna.
TSA: You can't have the tuna.
PILOT: Can I have, can i at least have the tupperware back?
TSA: No.
PILOT: Do you want my plastic spoon too!?
TSA: No.
PILOT: Well I don't need it now, I was going to eat the tuna with it. Here.
TSA: I don't want it.
PILOT: Well neither do I!
TSA: You can keep the spoon.
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tonyw
Well-Known Member
A Life Aloft
Well-Known Member
Gah....That's hysterical! Flashbacks.......it's 2002 and the great tuna wars begin.
z987k
Well-Known Member
Go back out, put on the uniform go through kcm then eat the tuna in front of the tsa officer.
A Life Aloft
Well-Known Member
That's the crap part, I was in uniform. After 9/11 things were very chaotic with security and it changed by the month. It was not very consistent in a lot of ways and you had people making up their own set of rules and how they should be carried out. Then some of them simply didn't understand the rules. Things would be different at different airports. The staffing for agents took place incredibly fast and let's just say that most of them were not exactly rocket scientists. If you think it's bad now, it was far worse back then, believe me. Not that singing the stripper dance tune and swinging your belt around in the air helped though, or pointing out the hole in the toe of your F/O's sock to everyone. lol God help you if you used foot powder in your shoes and had orthotics in them.
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Ajax
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Back when I instructed I dealt with TSA, unfortunately. I remember one day the lady sent me an email about our inspection. She attached a ms office style clip art badge to the email, it told me she was worthy of my respect.
Nowadays I have KCM, but I think we all get that TSA tool here and there. The guy that wanted to quiz me in engine out procedures, the one who wanted to bitch about pilots, but mostly the ones that just didn't work.
Nowadays I have KCM, but I think we all get that TSA tool here and there. The guy that wanted to quiz me in engine out procedures, the one who wanted to bitch about pilots, but mostly the ones that just didn't work.
BravoHotel
Well-Known Member
This reinforces why I don't like air travel. I obviously enjoy flying the aircraft or acting as a crew member. Time permitting I'd rather drive. That is ludicrous.
z987k
Well-Known Member
While it's certainly ridiculous that this happened, basing your opinion on .000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of air travel is just as ludicrous.
BravoHotel
Well-Known Member
Yup. I just don't like traveling by air.
I'll do it when I have to, but I still loathe it. FLYING the airplane sure lets go.