Becoming a Pilot

Se

Seriously?
Yes. Hard pill to take, but this young man has allowed his indiscretion to have an influence on his future. Take care of the kid first and foremost, your aspirations should be second to taking care of the family you've created. There are plenty of kids walking around who never had a father figure in their home as they grew up. Whether you like it or not, when you shoot that load and it hits home you are suddenly number two.
 
Yes. Hard pill to take, but this young man has allowed his indiscretion to have an influence on his future. Take care of the kid first and foremost, your aspirations should be second to taking care of the family you've created. There are plenty of kids walking around who never had a father figure in their home as they grew up. Whether you like it or not, when you shoot that load and it hits home you are suddenly number two.

Your post wasn't tough love, it was just being rude. I know at least 3 pilots who knocked up their girlfriends at between 19 and 21 who became very successful pilots. Tell me this, why is having a kid at 19 "poor judgment?" You don't even know the kid. It could be the perfect thing for his life. When is the appropriate time to have children in your eyes, oh wise one? Do you have kids?
 
Flying is an addiction.

If he wants to fly, he wants to fly.

Completely doable. And the family usually comes first, but how much more complete would a childs life be if his father both (a) made him a priority and (b) attained his dream.

Kids need something to shoot for, not just growing up to procreate and to live vicariously though their offspring.

Opinion only.

Go fly.
 
Yes. Hard pill to take, but this young man has allowed his indiscretion to have an influence on his future. Take care of the kid first and foremost, your aspirations should be second to taking care of the family you've created. There are plenty of kids walking around who never had a father figure in their home as they grew up. Whether you like it or not, when you shoot that load and it hits home you are suddenly number two.
Wow! Who peed in your Cheerios this morning?
Referring to a human being as an “indiscretion” is just…really messed up, dude, even if you knew all the details of the situation (which you don’t—for all we know, the child could have been 100% intentional). The tenacity and courage it takes to actively participate in raising a child at such a young age demonstrates way more responsibility than most, and responsibility is a great quality for a pilot to have. And what do you mean by a “father figure?” Do you mean a father who is physically present in a house all the time? Because honestly, I’m confused. My dad was away on business trips often, but his frequent absence from home made him no less of a father to me. And (echoing posts above) what better father figure could a kid have than one who pursued his dream? What better example than a man who not only discovered a passion, but followed his heart and built the future he wanted for himself?
 
Your post wasn't tough love, it was just being rude. I know at least 3 pilots who knocked up their girlfriends at between 19 and 21 who became very successful pilots. Tell me this, why is having a kid at 19 "poor judgment?" You don't even know the kid. It could be the perfect thing for his life. When is the appropriate time to have children in your eyes, oh wise one? Do you have kids?
My opinion is ignorant because I've never fathered a child. I don't care. You can take your snowflake to it's Da Vinci class and talk about it at Starbucks while you pick up your Large Coffee. I don't care about your kid, it's not my problem and I won't lift a finger or dollar to help. I have nieces and nephews that might be worth helping out, but the jury is still out on those kids. Having a three month old daughter and contemplating leaving them to follow his dream bothers me.
 
Wow! Who peed in your Cheerios this morning?
Referring to a human being as an “indiscretion” is just…really messed up, dude, even if you knew all the details of the situation (which you don’t—for all we know, the child could have been 100% intentional). The tenacity and courage it takes to actively participate in raising a child at such a young age demonstrates way more responsibility than most, and responsibility is a great quality for a pilot to have. And what do you mean by a “father figure?” Do you mean a father who is physically present in a house all the time? Because honestly, I’m confused. My dad was away on business trips often, but his frequent absence from home made him no less of a father to me. And (echoing posts above) what better father figure could a kid have than one who pursued his dream? What better example than a man who not only discovered a passion, but followed his heart and built the future he wanted for himself?
Did you read what I posted?
 
I don't have kids either man, but a life not lived is a life not lived.

I have a lot of friends that threw their dreams away because they procreated. Bad move.
 
I did. I disagree with you. Did I not make that clear?

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My opinion is ignorant because I've never fathered a child. I don't care. You can take your snowflake to it's Da Vinci class and talk about it at Starbucks while you pick up your Large Coffee. I don't care about your kid, it's not my problem and I won't lift a finger or dollar to help. I have nieces and nephews that might be worth helping out, but the jury is still out on those kids. Having a three month old daughter and contemplating leaving them to follow his dream bothers me.

So then you don't know what the hell you are talking about. OK, I can forgive ignorance, but I still can't forgive you being rude. Would you call this kid's daughter "his problem" to his face? I doubt it. My kids aren't "my problem" as you so eloquently put it, they're reason I strive to accomplish my dreams. I want my boys to look at me as they grow up and say, "wow, I can do anything I put my mind to."

As for "leaving them" to follow his dream bothering you, that's short sighted and foolish - how well can he provide for his kids if he works at Walgreens? He can't. And it's not like he's going to be gone forever, he might run off to ATPs or whatever pilot-mill for 4 months or so. The path I laid out gives him a reasonable, middle-class wage in a year or less, and will create a family that has a reasonable amount of economic security. He gets a skill that he can use to get ahead and provide for his family. He could probably buy a house on pay he'd make flying 2-weeks-on-2-weeks-off in west Alaska after a couple years.

What's better - paycheck to paycheck at Home Depot, or $55,000/ year flying up in Alaska and being home with no responsibilities for work for 2 weeks at a time? Don't throw away your dreams, it doesn't make a good family.
 
Okay okay, I feel like its time to interject here. Everyone knows text is a poor medium to communicate, look what happened to me when I made a snide remark about a CFI who flew his plane into the ground after being charged with assault. I said the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Relating a surprise to pilot-decision making is rude, however, we all know about rain coats, pills, and pulling out (which works when you commit to it...), you know the risks before getting involved. Bad planning leads to surprises. But, I know what pregnancy scares feel like and, well, our new friend doesn't need lecturing. Surprises are a hard way to learn fast.

I see @knot4u 's point per se, he's suggesting our new friend focus more on his kid rather than a dream. Everyone knows you become second banana when you have children, you should, as a good parent, put them first when necessary. So perhaps ensuring stability in his childs life should be more important.

HOWEVER, our friend is at the age when he doesn't have an education. He has nothing to bring to the table in terms of education or qualifications to the job market. Learning to fly will allow for him to do just that, and we all know that education and qualifications allow us to provide more for our families. This is what @ppragman is trying to say.

tl;dr Essentially at short distance it looks like a bad move for this guy because he wants to chase the dream, but at long distance its the right thing to do because chasing the dream means providing a future for his child, which at this point, is number one.
 
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