Do any of you not tell the truth?

Avalon781ML

Well-Known Member
I know the title is a little misleading but does anyone else not tell their family/loved ones about incidents that occur while flying whether it be for work or fun?
I had a little "problem" today with the plane I was flying and when asked by one of my parents in a subsequent phone convo about how my day was I simply replied "It was alright."
When I go to work I have my game face on.... when I leave I pull a superman and am "normal"... I guess I don't want my family worrying about me and thus just leave out certain parts of my day.

Is this abnormal and inconsiderate of me or simply a burden to be bourne until happy hour with coworkers?

Any thoughts from y'all?

B
 
Ever since
"How was your lesson?"

"They let me fly by myself today.....honey?"

I don't tell my wife anything other than "it was alright, I guess." or "I got sent to f'n St. Louis again...". I don't like sleeping on couches.

-mini
 
I didn't tell my mother about certain experiences I had as a CFI. She's a worry wart.

I learned that if you have kids and they are giving your wife a run for her money while you are away on a trip, you should not tell her what fun things you are doing, how relaxing it is, you had time to workout and watch a movie, and that you had a overall pleasant time on the overnight. It is better to tell her the hotel is crappy, the weather stinks, the days are long and that your crew drives you crazy. . . . And of course you miss her. (You should always tell her that anyway!) Misery loves company. The lie is better than making her jealous. :D Just a little marital advice. :) (I am saying this slightly tongue in cheek. :) )
 
I'd say it really depends. Sometimes if something was really annoying and I need to vent about it I will. Generally it's either just yea I had a good day, or that it didn't go smooth. I don't get into details.

I love my job but when I'm exhausted after a long day the last thing I want to do is talk about what bothered me at work and then have to explain it to someone as well.
 
I'm not sure if I lie!

I mean, if someone asks "how did things go", that's somewhat relative, isn't it?

I mean, the plane will fly again and so will I. So what if I blew both main tires on the 210 when landing? (that's a long story about how that happened!).

"How was flying today?"

"Great, it was my third time landing the 210 and I learned a lot".

Trust me, I was not lying!

Ok, so we hydroplaned off the runway in the 421 one rainy night back in May, and it turns out the plane will be totaled by insurance (sure doesn't look it either!). However, we're both ok and we made it to the bar for Martinis afterwards.

"How was the flight out to Michigan?"

"Challenging with all the bad weather, especially the landing with a really wet runway, and the winds suddenly beginning to gust as we touched down, but we still made it to the bar afterwards."

Heck, we did do just that! The plane, of course, was another story. However, it did get back to its parking space.

Sometimes it is just best to put things in relative terms. If you are fine that is all that matters.

Now, if you come home with some visible physical signs that something might have gone wrong, then perhaps that is a different story.
 
When my mom was alive, I'd tell her that the weather was bad, but emphasize my total unconcern and my confidence in the system and systems, even the couple of times I was in full on "making deals with God" mode. Now I'm blessed (?) enough to have a girlfriend who loves me to death but thinks flying is about as exciting as watching paint dry. When things go south now, I just say "I had a hard night at work...the radar didn't work, the storms were bad, tornadoes all over the midwest, 747s were reporting sever turbulence, but I figured I'd just check it out..." and then watch her eyes glaze over.

Flying is a solitary occupation. Make your peace with that. People who don't do this for a living are never going to be impressed by what you've done or flown. Your reward for risking your life is no one looking over your shoulder if you're lucky, and an NTSB report that blames you if you're not. Accept it, because that's the way it is. Find a way for it to mean something to you, because in the end it's not going to matter to anyone else.
 
Yeah the worst part is trying to explain a crazy in-flight situation to a non-pilot.

Totally true. Tried to explain a certain event (was definitely not boring by any means) and they were just looking at me with a blank stare. First and last time I try to go into detail with anyone that doesn't have any flying experience. Better to just keep it to yourself. :buck:
 
Flying is a solitary occupation. Make your peace with that. People who don't do this for a living are never going to be impressed by what you've done or flown.

I was just thinking about that the other day. I'm still working on my PPL but I can't really talk about my experiences so far with anyone but pilots. I've tried telling others but they just don't get it.
 
I know the title is a little misleading but does anyone else not tell their family/loved ones about incidents that occur while flying whether it be for work or fun?
I had a little "problem" today with the plane I was flying and when asked by one of my parents in a subsequent phone convo about how my day was I simply replied "It was alright."
When I go to work I have my game face on.... when I leave I pull a superman and am "normal"... I guess I don't want my family worrying about me and thus just leave out certain parts of my day.

Is this abnormal and inconsiderate of me or simply a burden to be bourne until happy hour with coworkers?

Any thoughts from y'all?

B

To answer your question this is what I do,
If it's going to scare/concern/worry a loved one like parents, wife,husband, gf,bf, nonpilot, than dont even bother because it just will make things harder for you and will upset you. You never want to go flying when you know a loved one is worried out of there mind about you (training flights/building time flights only) because if it's your job like 121 or 135 flying, than theres nothing you can do. I only answer if a loved one asks, if they do ask I only mention the positives, never what "went wrong" if anything during the flight.
A perfect example is when I did my long xcountry for my private. I told my mom I was flying solo, and she almost started crying cause she was soo worried that somthing might happen. She gave me the longest hug, as tight as she could telling me to reschedule for another day. I told her not to worry, I flew to KCRQ- KPSP-KRAL-KCRQ plenty of times and I was going to call her as soon as I got to PSP. The truth was I never been anywhere that far by myself before and had waited about 3 freakin weeks to do my xcountry due to IFR conditions, that day was the first sunny day in weeks and as close to me canceling that flight due to my mom upsetting me, I pressed on made it to PSP and called her, than finished up my trip and headed home. Wow what a relief for the both of us but ever since that one day,I have never told her anything I'm doing as far as training goes. Sometimes she will ask, "so hows your training going, what are you gonna do today"? I reply, "oh its ok nothing much just some review with my instructor thats all" and walk away. As much as I would like her to be more supporting and less worried, I rather not worry her. My father on the other hand is very supportive and just wants to see me succeed no matter what. My parents are seperated so they dont talk incase anyones wondering. This is just my story and preference, everyones situation I'm sure is a little different but hope this helps.
 
Is there really that much to worry about?

As the spouse of a once-pilot, I think I'd be insulted if he didn't tell me anything because he didn't want to worry me. Not only am I a grown woman who doesn't need "protection," but is flying really that dangerous? Sure, pilots almost die. But so do motorcyclists and regular vehicle operators.

Isn't flying still the safest way to travel? ;)

(As for not being impressed by what pilots do, I actually think non-pilots find it more impressive than other pilots do. It's always more interesting when it's not something you can do yourself. Or, at least, would go to the trouble to do yourself. IMO.)
 
Is there really that much to worry about?

No but accidents/incidents can still happen god forbid, just like motorcyclists and regular vehicle operators, the only difference is if you get a flat tire or engine dies on you, you can pull over and call a towtruck. A little different at 30,000 feet.

but is flying really that dangerous? Sure, pilots almost die. But so do motorcyclists and regular vehicle operators.

No flying is not that dangerous, but still a risk you take just like when you get in your car everyday to go somewhere. Car accidents happen everyday, you hear about it all the time on the news,radio, newspaper. Airplane accidents rarely happen but when they do, depending on the situation it's usually fatal. Again a little different thousands of feet in the air.

Isn't flying still the safest way to travel? ;)

It sure is!:) The skys are calling!!!:rawk:
 
A friend was taking flying lessons. He would tell his wife about each one. He had a lot of trouble with crosswind landings and told her about them. He even quit taking lessons because of his crosswind problems.

He and I met some years later and he went flying with me. We did the old low-pass-in-a-crosswind-slip maneuver. Turns out his instructor never tried it and his response was, "Wow! I can do that!!!" He decided to take lessons again.

His wife said no way and told him to buy a Harley instead. Telling her about the landing problems had taken the non-pilot normal fears about flying and exaggerate them to a degree that she was afraid he's crash every time he went up.

Take whatever lesson you want from that.
 
I used to tell my wife "a student got me into an inadvertent inverted spin today" but since she knew what my job was she was ok with it.
 
I dunno, maybe it's me, but if one can't tell their spouse or significant other details of their day because "their eyes glaze over," that's not good. I can understand not wanting to worry a "worry-wart mom"---I had one too and used to spare her gorey details of my life that would have caused her unnecessary upset. Sadly, she's no longer with us, but I'm sure she wouldn't have been too enamored with my new career!
 
Ellaborate?

I tell people about some of the horrific experiences. Why not?

Flying at 200AGL, cruisin' along doin' my job.... and then "splish splash" oil starts hitting the windscreen.... ok time to put it down... oil now covers windscreen...(sticks head out of window like dog for landing).... a little shaky in the knees after that.
 
I even consider making stuff up... Gee honey, I almost bought the farm today. Tonight could be our last night together. sob, sob, puppy dog eye thing- whatever works.
 
Is there really that much to worry about?

As the spouse of a once-pilot, I think I'd be insulted if he didn't tell me anything because he didn't want to worry me. Not only am I a grown woman who doesn't need "protection," but is flying really that dangerous? Sure, pilots almost die. But so do motorcyclists and regular vehicle operators.

Isn't flying still the safest way to travel? ;)

(As for not being impressed by what pilots do, I actually think non-pilots find it more impressive than other pilots do. It's always more interesting when it's not something you can do yourself. Or, at least, would go to the trouble to do yourself. IMO.)

Heck yeah. Had to call Kris a few years ago to pick me up from a farmer's field where I landed when my engine went TU. No sugar-coating that one!

Plus, I think you are the one and only person who knows all the dumbass things I've done. If the FAA ever gets a hold of you... I'd be toast!
 
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