Looks Like I Picked the Wrong Day To Fly Through Chicago

@Bandit_Driver
@av8tr1 You misunderstood. I have never had the Airline nor TSA ask to prove the guns are clear. Just declare, sign and go. Wow 5 months that's nuts. IIRC mine was paid out pretty fast. Of course they had video of numbnuts breaking into a firearms case and the a supervisor seeing the cut case and tape on the other end so they didn't have alot of room to wiggle...

I hear you. I hadn't either before this trip. But also have had to deal with the TSA every time (I carry pretty much everywhere). This was the first where the ticket agent handled everything, because Texas (gonna have to move there).

What I don't understand is what are they looking for? They don't check the gun itself (normally), they have never opened my gun boxes. Every single time it's been pull all my underwear out, sniff the crouch area, swab the inside of the case, wait for the bell. Rinse and repeat.

So what the phuck are they looking for?

Because "guns" my case has to be opened by a TSA agent who never looks in the closed lock box but swabs the phuck out of my clothing and everything else in my case, gets a couple of seconds to sniff my underwear (in case anyone is wondering I am not a 13 year old girl, 43 year old fat white guy), and then sends my case on to the same handling that everyone else gets.

Meanwhile tom dick and harry get to check their bags with no one going through it. No swabbing out in the inside, no sniffing their crotches, no pawing around. Just put it on the belt and send it on its way where it magically gets in to the bottom of the plane in minutes.

So what the phuck is the purpose of the special treatment for people of the gun?
 
Since this thread has gone off the tracks: ever since it was created, this pops into my head as soon as I see the thread title.


That is exactly what I wanted you to think of when I started the thread. And I think that you'd need to be smoking, drinking, taking amphetamines, snorting cocaine, and sniffing glue to not want to kill the TSA and your fellow passengers during that line.
 
Dude. Safest place to be in a helicopter crash...is in the helicopter. Those things spit parts in every direction! :)

Oh, hey, no argument here. I'm just responding to what I perceived to be the notion that helo guys are somehow ponces or affected for wearing flight suits. I felt sort of ridiculous wearing one for fixed wing air-ambo (yet so comfortable, and ours were black, so you also didn't have to worry about ketchup stains or laundry), but if anyone is justified in wearing the things, it's whirlygiggers. Maniacs! ;)
 
Hey I fly helicopters. Spinning blades of death. Upside down quisinart. Flying lawn mowers that fall from the sky at the slightest error. Giant gas cans that tend to crash a lot and when they do they they crash come straight down spewing burning fuel all over everyone. You've got to be a little crazy just to go near one.

@Boris Badenov
Wanna go for a ride?
 
@Boris Badenov
What happened to your highly rational fear of flying flaming death traps of doom?

Hit me up if you find yourself in SEA in the new year and I can probably make a ride happen. But you bring your own flight suit!
 
I didn't say I was afraid, I said they're dangerous. There's a difference. Any time our F/W was down for mx, I jumped at the chance to go ride along with the BKs. With the flightsuit I probably almost looked like I belonged there.
 
No, those are the equivalent of the stores where you have to call ahead to get them to open their doors and they open with two people to take care of you. Nordstrom would be more like where you take the middle seat and four rows of seats out and charge $200 more for it.
I've never really sat down to analyze either Midwest Express' experience or the mid-market in general, but I fear that if Midwest Express couldn't make the model work in a much more suitable economic climate, it may not be workable. The problem seems to be there is an ever diminishing mid-market. Airlines tend to be harbingers of the general state of socio-economics. "Travel for the rest of us" is just an early reflection of "life for the rest of us" in the neo-feudalist economy.
 
I've never really sat down to analyze either Midwest Express' experience or the mid-market in general, but I fear that if Midwest Express couldn't make the model work in a much more suitable economic climate, it may not be workable. The problem seems to be there is an ever diminishing mid-market. Airlines tend to be harbingers of the general state of socio-economics. "Travel for the rest of us" is just an early reflection of "life for the rest of us" in the neo-feudalist economy.

It's not a mid market. It's an upscale market. In the Great Recession, we saw companies like Nordstrom do well and companies like Walmart do well. Midmarket companies didn't.

Airlines have all gone the Walmart route. Come up with a Nordstrom like airline and you will get travelers with more money paying to fly them.
 
tonyw said:
It's not a mid market. It's an upscale market. In the Great Recession, we saw companies like Nordstrom do well and companies like Walmart do well. Midmarket companies didn't. Airlines have all gone the Walmart route. Come up with a Nordstrom like airline and you will get travelers with more money paying to fly them.
Hasn't a lot if the upper gone to corporate or fractional jets?
 
Hasn't a lot if the upper gone to corporate or fractional jets?

Again, there's a difference between upscale and high end. Fractionals are like boutiques where you call for an appointment, they know you by name, and when you show up for your appointment they have your favorite drink and two people there to take care of just you.

At upscale places like Nordstrom, you show up, you're taken care of, but there's one salesperson for like every ten customers.
 
I don't want to put words in his mouth, but what I think @tonyw is saying is that there is a pretty far delta between corporate/fractional and how the airlines are operating these days, and he believes there is a space in the market for a "premium" brand of 121 flying that lies between the two.

And that may be, but the idea gets murky for me when you factor in 1st class/Business class fares.
 
I don't want to put words in his mouth, but what I think @tonyw is saying is that there is a pretty far delta between corporate/fractional and how the airlines are operating these days, and he believes there is a space in the market for a "premium" brand of 121 flying that lies between the two.

And that may be, but the idea gets murky for me when you factor in 1st class/Business class fares.

Exactly.

From what I understand, very few people buy business or first class outright. Instead, they buy coach and use miles to upgrade. That's what I did when I traveled a lot for work because I wasn't allowed to buy business or first. I could only buy coach.

If I were king of the airline world, I'd start an airline with 737s that have four seats across and 20 rows instead of the six and 25. I'd make up for it by charging my passengers whatever premium is needed to make it work.

A back of the envelope calculation shows it'd cost like $400 more on a $500 flight. That may seem like a lot.

Dress shirts at Macy's are available for around $30. At Nordstrom, some of them are around $150.

Nordstrom is still in business.
 
Exactly.

From what I understand, very few people buy business or first class outright. Instead, they buy coach and use miles to upgrade. That's what I did when I traveled a lot for work because I wasn't allowed to buy business or first. I could only buy coach.

If I were king of the airline world, I'd start an airline with 737s that have four seats across and 20 rows instead of the six and 25. I'd make up for it by charging my passengers whatever premium is needed to make it work.

A back of the envelope calculation shows it'd cost like $400 more on a $500 flight. That may seem like a lot.

Dress shirts at Macy's are available for around $30. At Nordstrom, some of them are around $150.

Nordstrom is still in business.
I don't know the ins and outs of what happened to them, but I flew on Legend Airlines back in 2000 when they only operated for a short time. All leather seats, DirectTV at every seat and good food. I think AMR and the Wright amendment might have been their demise.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legend_Airlines
 
I took the liberty... to enhance,


Hungry Pilot vs TSA Officer.

TSA: What's that?
PILOT: It's tuna.
TSA: What's all that liquid?
PILOT: Ah...it's just a little mayo and lemon juice.
TSA: What else is in there?
PILOT: Ah...... a little onion, green pepper, pickles and black olives.
TSA: It's too big.
PILOT: Too big for what? It's my lunch.
TSA: You can't take it.
PILOT: I haven't eaten in six hours.
TSA: What's in there?
PILOT: Crackers.
TSA: You can keep those.
PILOT: But they go with the tuna.
TSA: You can't have the tuna.
PILOT: But I want the tuna, it's my lunch.
TSA: It's too big.
PILOT: I promise not to start a tuna war with it. I am just going to eat it.
TSA: You can keep the crackers.
PILOT: Look, I'll trade you the crackers for the tuna.
TSA: You can't have the tuna.
PILOT: Can I have, can i at least have the tupperware back?
TSA: No.
PILOT: Do you want my plastic spoon too!?
TSA: No.
PILOT: Well I don't need it now, I was going to eat the tuna with it. Here.
TSA: I don't want it.
PILOT: Well neither do I!
TSA: You can keep the spoon.

Had something very similar to this happen at Dallas Love a few weeks ago. They flagged my bag for a search, cleared whatever it was and I was walking away with my bag. I shortly hear "Sir!, hold on a minute, there's one more thing" I always try to be courteous to the TSA guys, they're mostly just normal guys and gals stuck working and following asinine regulations, it's usually helped me get through fast. Anyway I come back:
TSA:"there's one more item I needed to check"
it's my water bottle, forgot to empty it of the highly dangerous water.
Me "Oh sorry, forgot to empty it, I'll just dump the water in the trash can here" (I'm standing next to a trash can)
TSA lady "No, sorry, you'll have to take it out of the security, empty it, then come back through"
Me "I can't dump it in the trash here? what about a bathroom sink over there?" (10yards away)
TSA "No, you'll have to go outside security to empty it"
Me "Fine, I'll just chug down the water real quick"
TSA "No, can't do that, you'll have to take it outside of security to empty it"
Me: "So I can empty it over there but not here? That doesn't make sense"
TSA *Shrugs* "No it doesn't, but that's the rules"
I never, never get mad or loose my temper.....I started seeing red. But it was only a $1 water bottle
Me: "Fine, you can toss it"
TSA, she throws the water bottle in the trash that I wanted to empty it into.

I keep day dreaming what would have happened if I had just snatched the bottle out of her hand and either emptied it or chugged it.
 
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