Top 10 (need some help)...

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What are the last words of a redneck pilot?

"Hey, y'all, watch this."

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I like :

Hey, Hold my beer, and watch this!!!
 
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Hey, that's just one less guy competing against you!



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Now you're thinkin!
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Just like at work, whenever a guy asks me how flying the MD-88 in DFW is, I look at his seniority number instantly.

If he's junior to me, "Oh, it's a great plane! Takes a little getting used to, but not bad at all"

If he's senior to me, "Man, you know it's been almost four years and the thing still does stuff to scare the bejeezus out of me. It's like trying to stand on a basketball and juggle simultaneously. Walk, nay, RUN as fast as you can when you see a spot in DFW open up on the bid!"
 
How about: "Enough about flying....let's talk about me for a while!"

(The punch line to: "How can you tell when a date with a pilot is halfway over?")
 
Wanna talk about me, wanna talk about I, wanna talk about number one me my oh my...
 
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