Top 10 (need some help)...

Kristie

Mama Bear....
Staff member
I need some sayings or phrases or even expressions that most pilots would say about wanting to be or being a pilot...

to chicks/about chicks
at interviews
to future pilots
in the cockpit
about security
about las vegas

etc etc...

what I'm trying to do is make a tshirt - Doug's top 10 list of Pilot ....something...i was gonna use "phrases" but i dont really like that term much - so now i'm thinking of "Doug's top 10 reasons you want to be a pilot" and going on that stretch of road....

however (and yes, i'm changing my mind as i write - haha) I still like the idea of "Doug's top 10 aviation phrases" and would really like to "spoof" that just as Dave Letterman spoof's his top 10's every night...

what we'll do is sell the shirt to wear to/in vegas for our 1st annual "gathering"....or if you can't make it, buy one anyways for home or what not....

needs to be good (and mostly clean) spoofs for all the LV girls out there (pick up lines might be ok) and/or future jetcareers members!!!

I figure - if you can afford it, help us fund/advertise jetcareers while we're out there!!

whatcha think? any ideas are welcome!


Thanks for your thoughts in advance!
 

I_Money

Moderator
Re: Top 10...

Kristie you make it too easy!!

1) Network Network Network

2) Get a degree in a non-aviation related subject

3) Aviation is a small world - don't burn any bridges

4) Stay away from PFT - it is bad for the industry

5) PIC is golden

6) Take out your trash before you start a trip

7) You are never too old to start - Delta hired a 50 year old.

8) Contrary to popular belief you do not need perfect vision to be a pilot.

9) Flight attendants are there to save your ass - not kiss.

10) *something bad about the TSA that we can not print*
 

Rodelu

Well-Known Member
The 33 Greatest Lies in Aviation

I'm from the FAA and I'm here to help you.
***
Me? I've never busted minimums.
***
We will be on time, maybe even early.
***
Pardon me, ma'am, I seem to have lost my jet keys.
***
I have no interest in flying for the airlines.
***
I fixed it right the first time, it must have failed for other reasons.
***
All that turbulence spoiled my landing.
***
I'm a member of the mile high club.
***
I only need glasses for reading.
***
I broke out right at minimums.
***
The weather is gonna be alright; it's clearing to VFR.
***
Don't worry about the weight and balance -- it'll fly.
***
If we get a little lower I think we'll see the lights.
***
I'm 22, got 6000 hours, a four year degree and 3000 hours in a Lear.
***
We shipped the part yesterday.
***
I'd love to have a woman co-pilot.
***
All you have to do is follow the book.
***
This plane outperforms the book by 20 percent.
***
We in aviation are overpaid, underworked and well respected.
***
Oh sure, no problem, I've got over 2000 hours in that aircraft.
***
I have 5000 hours total time, 3200 are actual instrument.
***
No need to look that up, I've got it all memorized.
***
Sure I can fly it -- it has wings, doesn't it?
***
We'll be home by lunchtime.
***
Your plane will be ready by 2 o'clock.
***
I'm always glad to see the FAA.
***
We fly every day -- we don't need recurrent training.
***
It just came out of annual -- how could anything be wrong?
***
I thought YOU took care of that.
***
I've got the field in sight.
***
I've got the traffic in sight.
***
Of course I know where we are.
***
I'm SURE the gear was down
 

Kristie

Mama Bear....
Staff member
ok.. i need some more suggestions...

Rodelu,
I can't use most of those cuz I think we want to promote being a pilot, not deter from it - right??? hahahha - plus we can't be naming the TSA or FAA or any of those bigwigs otherwise we may end up getting in some heat...

Iain,

I can't use all those either cuz otherwise there'd be no reason to come to jetcareers.com! hahhaa

thanks for the suggestions - I may be able to use a few but I really want to keep focus on promoting becoming a pilot, being a pilot, having unions, working for the airlines, having fun, impressing the single chicks....

so far, on my "Doug's top 10 aviation phases"

I have :

1) "Did I mention I'm a pilot?"
2) "I REALLY want to try the new TGIF at XXX airport"
3) "My highlight of the day? Getting frisked by security"
4) "Join your union"
5) "Get that 4 year degree"
6) "Just because I have a uniform on doesn't mean I know where baggage claim is"

just some good jibes that are nice and clean, yet corny....
 

pilot602

If specified, this will replace the title that
To put the thread back on track ... didn't mean to derail it Kristie, honest - please don't hit me ...


how bout -

"Hey lookey there we're 5,200 ft. above the ground. Wink. Wink."

"Autopilot? We don't need no stinkin' autopilot!"

"Like my watch?"

"My watch can keep time in chineese, taihitian and fourty timezones."

"Pilots like the flare" (thats kind of a realy obscure one)

"An office with a view ... at 30,000 ft."

"I think if I can fly a multi-million dollar aircraft I can drive a simple car (he says looking out the sunroof at an airplane moments before smacking into the car in front of him)."
 

ready2fly

Well-Known Member
[ QUOTE ]
"I think if I can fly a multi-million dollar aircraft I can drive a simple car (he says looking out the sunroof at an airplane moments before smacking into the car in front of him)."


[/ QUOTE ]
My wife would agree with that one.
 

jtrain609

Anarcho-Bidenist
Ahhh...yeah there has to be a watch one on there. I mean...what's a pilot without a watch?

Cheers


John Herreshoff
 

Kristie

Mama Bear....
Staff member
THAT is incredible John!!!!!

Excellent work - that's so good, it's going on the front!


Then we'll have our "Doug's Top Ten Aviation Phrases"...on the back...

1) Did I mention that I'm a pilot?
2) Keep the shiny side up and the greasy side down.
3) Nothing quite like an office with a view ... at 30,000 ft
4) I love getting frisked, but not by security
5) Too much noise? want us to turn off the engines?
6) I REALLY want to try the new TGIF at XXX airport
7) Be nice to your first officer, he may be your captain later on
8) Like my watch?
9) Who was the best pilot I ever saw? You're lookin' at 'im.
9) You think it's so easy, fly your own stinkin plane!
10) Join your union!

maybe we'll add an 11th.. haha

11) The only thing that scares me about flying is the drive to the airport.

thoughts? ideas?
 

E_Dawg

Moderator
I kinda like these....


[ QUOTE ]
Pardon me, ma'am, I seem to have lost my jet keys.
***
All that turbulence spoiled my landing.
***
I broke out right at minimums.
***
We in aviation are overpaid, underworked and well respected.
***
Sure I can fly it -- it has wings, doesn't it?
***
Of course I know where we are.
***
I'm SURE the gear was down


[/ QUOTE ]


We could get the best 20 - 30 and have a poll... top 10 percentage pts wins, subject to executive veto by Doug and Kristie...

Pilot602 that frikin ROCKS!!! You're one talented FELLA!

 

rausda27

Well-Known Member
Top ten thing you dont want to hear your pilot say...

1. "The union president called - he said the pilots' strike starts IMMEDIATELY."

2. "We'll just ask the flight attendant to wake us up when we get there."

3. "My name is Forrest Gump - people call me Forrest Gump."

4. "Hey, Jim, do you remember where we're going?"

5. "Buckle your seat belt - I'm going to try something I saw in a cartoon."

6. "Bye, bye, Miss American Pie..."

7. "Wow, we're sure a lot lighter now that we dropped that second engine!"

8. "Only 500 more flight hours, and I'll get my license!"

9. "They say this plane practically flies itself. Good thing, huh?"

10. What does this button do?
 
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