To all CFI's: Stupidest student questions.

Took two Japanese flight attendants for a sight-seeing ride in a Schweizer 2-32 (only glider certified for two passengers). After about 15 minutes the more intelligent of the two asks, "So, how long will it fly on a tank of gas?"
 
fholbert said:
That's how everyone who logs off a hobbs meter logs it. How many students/pilots/instructors deduct 3/10 for taxi out, run-up and taxi in?
Click to expand...

If you are taxing from the fuel pumps to the tie downs, then you were not going flying. Therefore you can't log it as flight time.

Otherwise I've got a great idea for time builders, get a trashed out unairworthy plane that will still run and taxi it around the airport all day.
 
I asked a student to look at the compass and tell me which way was north. We had a nice big n already on the compass and they pointed to the right. This was 30hrs into flight training and would get lost on top of the airport. Not really a student question but I could see the question marks over their head as I asked it.
 
These stories have me laughing hard enough to disturb the neighbors! Reminds me-my neighbor and I were having lunch the other day and out of the blue she asks me…
Neighbor: Can you see the state lines?
Me: What do you mean?
Neighbor: When your flying…can you see the state lines like on the map?
Me: Laughing…finally figure out she is not kidding…uhh…wait..seriously?
 
USMCmech said:
If you are taxing from the fuel pumps to the tie downs, then you were not going flying. Therefore you can't log it as flight time.

Otherwise I've got a great idea for time builders, get a trashed out unairworthy plane that will still run and taxi it around the airport all day.
Click to expand...

LOL, technically only taxi time can be counted when the aircraft is moved with the intention of flight.
 
Bandit_Driver said:
LOL, technically only taxi time can be counted when the aircraft is moved with the intention of flight.
Click to expand...

(1) Pilot time that commences when an aircraft moves under its own power for the purpose of flight and ends when the aircraft comes to rest after landing; or

I suspect you were also implying that there had to be a flight in there too, not just the intention of flight. As the definition in 14 CFR Part 1 says, flight time starts with ........ and ends when ...... AFTER LANDING. Ergo, no flight, no landing, no flight time. I just wanted to ensure nobody misinterpreted your statement as saying that as long as the person "intends to fly" that the taxi time counts.

Although now I'm thinking of that famous video clip of the fellow who got in the helicopter and accidentally took off. I guess legally he couldn't log it because he didn't intend to be flying. However, that was probably the least of his concerns at that point.
 
Guy said:
Although now I'm thinking of that famous video clip of the fellow who got in the helicopter and accidentally took off. I guess legally he couldn't log it because he didn't intend to be flying. However, that was probably the least of his concerns at that point.
Click to expand...
Nice twist ~ so I couldn't help but respond.
Actually there doesn't have to be a 'personal intention' to fly. The regulation says 'when the aircraft moves under it's own power..'til after landing. Yeah, there does have to be a 'flight' and a landing, but the reg never says 'intent', it says 'purpose under it's own power', and it only states the facts that start and end a 'flight'.

Key word being 'flight'.
...

However, I didn't intend to carry on the 'highjacking' of this thread by beating the old 'flight time' dead horse. I don't care how anybody does it. I was sucked in by the play on 'intent' rater than 'purpose'.
....

When I first started reading this thread, I was "Mr. Grumpy", the old man cfi who thought it childish and improper for flight instructors to sit around and joke and laugh about their students ~
(gigity) ...until I read a few and began to slowly fall back in time to when I used to do the same thing. And we all learned from it.

To an 'outsider', it may seem that the 'instructors' are 'laughing down' at their students, but we all are laughing at our own selves because we all make mistakes and say and do stupid things.

And students know it too, and so we are all in the same room looking for 'tips'; 'insight'; 'info'; just plain old entertainment aviation related.

So here's one of my 'stupid student' events.

First day in the Army Aviator Fixed-Wing Course, doing a walk-around pre-flight with a student, on a Cessna L-19 Birddog.
(basic airframe of a Cessna 180)
After walking around the tail, I'm leading him up the side of the fuselage towards the cockpit door (under the wing), and he walks straight-up into the trailing edge of the flap. Smacked him straight across the forehead right between the hairline and eyebrows. Didn't cut, but made a sharp red line.
I stepped out, crouched down under the wing, and asked him, "Did you hurt it?" (looking intently at the possible cut)

He stepped back, looked intently at the trailing edge of the flap, reached up and squeezed it between his fingers, and said, "No, I don't think so, Sir."
 
Neighbor: Can you see the state lines?
Me: What do you mean?
Neighbor: When your flying…can you see the state lines like on the map?
Click to expand...

lol
-tell her that you can see the state line when the border is a river!

I used to work line service at an airport where there are a lot of helicopters doing long line training. You know when they train to carry the water buckets or whatever underneath?? A passenger in our lobby was watching this and asked if that line underneath the helicopter was to keep it tied down so that it wouldn't fly away... yeah, just like a dog on a leash!
 
I don't know if this goes as stupid more than loony bin. Back when I was a CFI, I had a CommSEL student who would add an extra 150lbs on his flights. This was after about our 10th flight together. So I look over his W&B and asked him what's the extra weight for. "Oh, that's for my friend Zarnox." Me, "?/Que?" Student, "Yeah he helps me on my maneuvers and gives me extra aft C.G." Okay let's go flying! What response could I have said after that?
 
robofos said:
lol
-tell her that you can see the state line when the border is a river!

I used to work line service at an airport where there are a lot of helicopters doing long line training. You know when they train to carry the water buckets or whatever underneath?? A passenger in our lobby was watching this and asked if that line underneath the helicopter was to keep it tied down so that it wouldn't fly away... yeah, just like a dog on a leash!
Click to expand...

Oh wow! That is a good one. Eventually I did tell her about the rivers! =)
 
Soul Brotha' said:
I don't know if this goes as stupid more than loony bin. Back when I was a CFI, I had a CommSEL student who would add an extra 150lbs on his flights. This was after about our 10th flight together. So I look over his W&B and asked him what's the extra weight for. "Oh, that's for my friend Zarnox." Me, "?/Que?" Student, "Yeah he helps me on my maneuvers and gives me extra aft C.G." Okay let's go flying! What response could I have said after that?
Click to expand...
Hahaha, that's great. Was he the leg pulling type or legitimately nuts?
 
Soul Brotha' said:
I don't know if this goes as stupid more than loony bin. Back when I was a CFI, I had a CommSEL student who would add an extra 150lbs on his flights. This was after about our 10th flight together. So I look over his W&B and asked him what's the extra weight for. "Oh, that's for my friend Zarnox." Me, "?/Que?" Student, "Yeah he helps me on my maneuvers and gives me extra aft C.G." Okay let's go flying! What response could I have said after that?
Click to expand...

I would have said that I wanted to use actual weights on the next flight and then brought a scale in with me for the next flight. Instruct him to have his "friend" step onto the scale so we could input his weight onto the W&B. Problem solved!
 
Soul Brotha' said:
I don't know if this goes as stupid more than loony bin. Back when I was a CFI, I had a CommSEL student who would add an extra 150lbs on his flights. This was after about our 10th flight together. So I look over his W&B and asked him what's the extra weight for. "Oh, that's for my friend Zarnox." Me, "?/Que?" Student, "Yeah he helps me on my maneuvers and gives me extra aft C.G." Okay let's go flying! What response could I have said after that?
Click to expand...

WOW...
 
After about 10 lessons I had an Indian student tell me he was studying for his multi rating. Being that we were training in a Grumman Tiger I asked him why, and he looks at me and seriously thought we had two engines because we open both sides of the cowling on pre flight.
 
In the pattern one day with a student; the day started out to be particularly windy and bumpy but calmed down through our flight. Tower asked for a ride report. My student proceeded to go on a 3 minute narration of how our flight was..."started out windy and a little bumpy, but now it's really nice up here. I just can't seem to get these landings but I am working on it" etc...

Tower responded and through a cab full of laughter said "thank you".
 
"Carbondale tower, Cessna 12345 is 9 miles west in bound for the option with information..................watermelon."

lol
 
I had a student tell me that the reason we check the engine oil during the preflight is to ensure that we have enough hydraulic fluid to operate the landing gear. And this is in a fixed gear Cessna!

I was just like righhhhht......
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top