Sorry to hear about the accident. RIP.
my old man said, there are 2 ways to get a Pilot certificate. If you want to do it right at 17, be my guest, and find a way to paiy for it yourself.
If you want my help, both finantially and tips and guidance, I want a college degree first.
Became a Graphic Software Engineer first, saved some money, and got my credentials amongst 17-19 year olds at 26-27. Guess who was the first to land a Job?
Today I agree, regulation minimums do not always mean safe, and age is irrelevant. Maturity is more so, and If a kid shows enough maturity at 17, go ahead. But from personal experience, I'd let them fizzle some before actually start handling aircraft with people on board.
Take Care