The Inevitable.

BravoHotel

BravoHotel

Well-Known Member
My father is circling the drain. 'Nam Navy Vet, 35 years with the city of Seattle. My folks split the month after I graduated boot camp in 2000. He has been a stubborn loner ever since. He smoked all his life and is in critical condition at a Seattle area hospital. I fly there tomorrow morning to I hope not say my final goodbyes. I lost my mom almost exactly two years ago to day.
 
Best wishes as you say “Good-bye.” Loss is tough, but we all go through it (and those WE love will, too). Nothin’ gonna’ change now about the past. Be bigger than hurt from days long gone, if any remains. Blessings to you.
 
Oh hell, there are no words to change this sad scenario, I'm afraid. Just go and be with him. Hold his hand, hug him, tell him that you love him. With losing your Mom not that long ago, I am sure this is bringing up a lifetime of conflicts, emotions, regrets, remembering the good times and the not so good times, etc. Your head is probably spinning. Do you have good friends and or any relatives to be with to help you during this time? I hope so. Lean of them. Don't try to carry this alone. It's okay to feel whatever you are feeling right now and to get some support. Try as best you can to calm yourself some. So very sorry that your Dad is this ill and struggling. Post back and let us know what happens and how you are doing. Sending you a big bro hug from the west coast. Will be thinking of you and your Dad.
 
It’s rough, but something we’re all going to go through.

My only suggestion is to spend time. My dad was in the death throes for about two months whereas it was moments of heavy drama followed by “I think he’s going to pull through” and then he didn’t.

Spend some time, tell him all the things you want to tell him.
 
I'm sorry. It sucks. Don't let it drag you down a bad path. I still think about my dad daily, but it doesn't hurt as much as it used to. Try to have meaningful conversations with him during the time you still have. He might have some things he wants to tell you.
 
BravoHotel said:
My father is circling the drain. 'Nam Navy Vet, 35 years with the city of Seattle. My folks split the month after I graduated boot camp in 2000. He has been a stubborn loner ever since. He smoked all his life and is in critical condition at a Seattle area hospital. I fly there tomorrow morning to I hope not say my final goodbyes. I lost my mom almost exactly two years ago to day.
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Sorry to hear this. Been there. Growing up it was the three of us. I lost my brother to a police involved shooting. Then my mother to cancer just a year later. Leaving me. There is NOTHING wrong with talking to someone even if you don't think you need it. Let things out. Do not hold feelings, thoughts or emotions in. Spend what time you have with him.
 
Oxman said:
Sorry to hear this. Been there. Growing up it was the three of us. I lost my brother to a police involved shooting. Then my mother to cancer just a year later. Leaving me. There is NOTHING wrong with talking to someone even if you don't think you need it. Let things out. Do not hold feelings, thoughts or emotions in. Spend what time you have with him.
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Damn man. Sorry you had to go through that.
 
Update: So my dad is no longer critical, but by no means out of the woods. The fact he is being a hard ass tells us a few things: One he is ornry, two he is going to fight. There are things that are sad state of affairs which we are addressing. I was with him every day this week Tonight I am headed home to Sacramento because I have to go back to work and he is out of the deep stuff. My sister and brother live locally so he has company.
 
Glad you went.

Twice with my mom, who rallied both times. Didn’t make the third when she died.

No regrets. Hope you have none, either, when the time comes.

We do what we can.
 
I'm sorry to hear that. Cherish every minute with him. The older I get, the more I try and hangout with my parents.
 
BravoHotel said:
Well it happened. I feel sad, I’m half way across the globe.
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Sorry for your loss, but glad you made it to see him while you could. This job sucks some times where we're on the other side of this flat earth when we need to be home. Best of luck and absolutely reach out if you need to talk to somebody. Any of us would gladly spend time talking to you if you need it.
 
Stone Cold said:
Sorry for your loss, but glad you made it to see him while you could. This job sucks some times where we're on the other side of this flat earth when we need to be home. Best of luck and absolutely reach out if you need to talk to somebody. Any of us would gladly spend time talking to you if you need it.
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Thank you for the kind reply. I’m in the process of getting my pieces together. I should be on a plane tomorrow and the two day trip home after that.
 
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