Murdoughnut
Well sized member
When a parent loses a child like that, it's pretty common to be unable to 'process' the kid's stuff. Often they'll just close the door to the kid's room and simply never go in there again. They usually need a family member or friend to do it for them, if it's to be done at all. I can't imagine having to go through my kids' rooms if something like that happened to me. Though honestly, if it were me, I'd want to do it fairly soon afterwards, and just get it over with. If it's left to sit, it'll just rip open those emotional wounds all over again when it eventually HAS to be done.
Our middle school band director's son was 2 years older than me, and died of complications during an epileptic seizure at age 16. He never recovered from that loss. They had to move from their house, not because of foreclosure or anything but because they simply couldn't stay in that house with the memories of Robbie [the son]. So they moved across town within a year. He had been a happy, energetic, spritely guy who was always fast with a joke... he died of cancer less than 10 years later, a hollow, empty, shell of a person. Very, very sad. When my cousin (3 days older than me) died in 2003 his mom (my aunt) would go and sit in his house for weeks afterwards... wouldn't clean it out, wash anything, etc. It took a while for them to be able to clean out the house & do what needed to be done.
In this particular case, it kind of sounds like there were financial issues already present before the accident even happened. Sadly fairly common in divorce...I know it sounds harsh, but I do think she'd probably be better off in the long run getting rid of the big, expensive, memory-filled house. It sucks to have it taken away in a foreclosure situation on the heels of losing your kids like that though.
I can't even imagine how people in that situation get up in the morning. We had two officers killed in the line of duty here last year in a single incident. One officer had a wife and two children. The other had a wife and no children. From talking to my police friends, the one with kids is actually doing pretty well all things considered - probably because she has the kids to live for. The one without kids is in a state similar to the gentleman you mentioned above.
I'm still a couple of months away from my two showing up, but I can't even imagine what it's like to lose a child.