Please tell me this is real

Meh, phony lost and found beagle........we have the mighty Beagle Brigades! Now if we could just train them to replace the TSA.

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Wait, didn't TSA replace them in the first place?
No. The beagles are specifically used by APHIS and trained by the USDA. The TSA in a different program, has been using other various canine breeds to detect explosives at airports.
 
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That damned beagle at JFK will give off false alarms just to get in your head.

Kind of like the pre-crime program in "Minority Report". Even before you think of bringing someone back you maaaaaybe shouldn't bring, the image of that dog taking special interest in your bag just springs up like the robot head on Rock'em Sock'em Robots.
 
It must be a lonely existence to be a dog working for the TSA. You have to wear a sign that says "DO NOT PET"
There was a German Shepard at SFO that liked me, I would always ask to pet it despite that sign, and they'd let me haha.
 
Why would a dog need training to replace TSA? I mean, it wouldn't actually have to succeed at anything... We'd be better off from day one, as the only thing they would steal from passengers is dog treats.
 
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