Marriage Pressure...
- Thread starter mtsu_av8er
- Start date
TheShortOne
Well-Known Member
i don't think a married couple is necissariliy more committed to eachother per se, but i do think not being married makes it easier to walk away when things get really bad instead of trying to work them out (but that depends like all of this, on the people involved). How about things like next of kin, being able to sign her kid's school forms (unless you can do that now, but up here it has to be parent/guardian of the kid) or what if, heaven forbid, something really bad should happen to her and her parents want to keep her on life support but you know she wouldn't want that and want her to be taken off (or whatever her wishes would be) as a husband you have precedent over the parents because you are considered to be closer to her. Then you can file joint taxes claim eachother's children as dependants and other fun gov't related things like that
But like i said before, for me it's more of a public declaration of committment/love for family/friends. Perhaps are you dragging your feet because you went through a messy divorce before and are afraid you might have to do that again? (dunno, just askin and you don't have to answer if it's too personal)
ok that's all from me now
ok that's all from me now
mtsu_av8er
Well-Known Member
I understand all of the things you're saying, but a power of attorney can do just about any of those things! The taxes - well, My daughter lives with her Mom, so that's a non-issue.. She's already getting my life insurance money if I should croak...
My last divorce was really clean and easy! My ex and I are still friends and there was no fighting whatsoever! I'm not even worried about a dirty, bitter divorce.
Who knows...I think I need therapy!!!
My last divorce was really clean and easy! My ex and I are still friends and there was no fighting whatsoever! I'm not even worried about a dirty, bitter divorce.
Who knows...I think I need therapy!!!
TheShortOne
Well-Known Member
ya i agree
i have no idea then...it's just something women like to do...get all dressed up spend lots of money and have a big party
i guess to me it seems like marriage is the ultimate thing you can offer someone, not that you can't have the same level of commitment...but i don't know...i can't explain what i mean
i have no idea then...it's just something women like to do...get all dressed up spend lots of money and have a big party
i guess to me it seems like marriage is the ultimate thing you can offer someone, not that you can't have the same level of commitment...but i don't know...i can't explain what i mean
mtsu_av8er
Well-Known Member
[ QUOTE ]
i have no idea then...it's just something women like to do...get all dressed up spend lots of money and have a big party
[/ QUOTE ]
Finally, someone came right out and said it....
i have no idea then...it's just something women like to do...get all dressed up spend lots of money and have a big party
[/ QUOTE ]
Finally, someone came right out and said it....
TheShortOne
Well-Known Member
Adding marriage onto a relationship is like adding "esprit de corps" to a friendship. It's just one more level to the relationship. It's hard to define sometimes, and difficult to explain where the depth of commitment comes from.
Think about your commitment to your childhood best friend growing up: he was your best buddy and you'd do "anything" for him. Compare that to the commitment to fellow Marines. Where you'd really do anything for them.
Marriage can (or at least should) do the same thing for a relationship. When those difficult times come (and they always will), that extra level of personal commitment that marriage brings to the table is somehow like the commitment that you have to fellow Marines in combat.
When things are really bad, that extra level of personal commitment is what can help carry you through when you really don't want to. You will not only go the extra mile, but carry the other person while you do....
[/goofy metaphor]
Think about your commitment to your childhood best friend growing up: he was your best buddy and you'd do "anything" for him. Compare that to the commitment to fellow Marines. Where you'd really do anything for them.
Marriage can (or at least should) do the same thing for a relationship. When those difficult times come (and they always will), that extra level of personal commitment that marriage brings to the table is somehow like the commitment that you have to fellow Marines in combat.
When things are really bad, that extra level of personal commitment is what can help carry you through when you really don't want to. You will not only go the extra mile, but carry the other person while you do....
[/goofy metaphor]
mtsu_av8er
Well-Known Member
Rhetoric....
music
New Member
The answers are in your own text my man.
"SHE doesnt want to because HER friends and family wont be there."
She wants to feel like its official, for her AND her friends and family... There is nothing wrong with that most people are like that but thats your reason why.
I have a feeling you already know that though. That leads me to this.
[ QUOTE ]
"So, my question : Does a married couple have a bigger connection to one another? Are they more committed? If that's yes, then in what way are you more committed?"
[/ QUOTE ]
The answer to that question is the same as the answer to this question "Why dont you want to get married if its only $400, 8 signatures, and a notary?"
Whatever is making you hold back is what scares her and wants you to put aside. You just gotta decide if thats what YOU want.
"SHE doesnt want to because HER friends and family wont be there."
She wants to feel like its official, for her AND her friends and family... There is nothing wrong with that most people are like that but thats your reason why.
I have a feeling you already know that though. That leads me to this.
[ QUOTE ]
"So, my question : Does a married couple have a bigger connection to one another? Are they more committed? If that's yes, then in what way are you more committed?"
[/ QUOTE ]
The answer to that question is the same as the answer to this question "Why dont you want to get married if its only $400, 8 signatures, and a notary?"
Whatever is making you hold back is what scares her and wants you to put aside. You just gotta decide if thats what YOU want.