In iraq and now she wants to leave me

x2 on the DTB! She is not worth your time or the phone card $ you use to call her.

Sounds like your "Best Friend" deserves to get his ass handed to him too.

Enjoy your new found freedom. Never look back.



Thanks for fighting the god fight.
 
Okay,

For summarization purposes:

Keep her: 0
Dump her: 41

*Above information is for reference only and in no way represents my opinion.
 
Leave her! I can't tell you how much fun I had when I was single. I hope my wife doesn't read these boards:laff:
 
Not everybody can get liquored up with an attractive gal night after night and be the gentleman he thinks himself to be.

Perhaps they should enjoy the freedom to explore their newfound feelings for each other.

Bummer when the 2 closest to you FAIL!!
Jodie got your girl and's gone. Left, right, left.

They SUCK, but I would like to thank you for serving our country
Doin' the deal

You're bein' the real man in this situation. Twenty years from now they will look at each other with such great admiration,...
 
exerauflyboy5 said:
Long time GF and soon to be fiancé (since i have the money now, and if she says yes), has been up to some funny things. Since ive been here she has been hanging out a lot with my very good long time buddy mike, random nights of the week they go to a bar until late, spend a lot of time together snowboarding, went wine tasting once. And the other day she tells me she doesn't love me like she use to, and shes afraid we are on two different paths, things along those lines. And she also tells me she confused frustrated, and doesn't know what she wants. Her and mike both say they are just hanging out and friends, but it does live a load of room for interpretation. So my questions is this,
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I went through this VERY thing when I was deployed once!

I hate to break it to you, but he's doing her.

Leave her.

You'll be happier for it.

Thanks for serving, brother. PM me if you need anything.
 
I'll take a different perspective on this ...

exerauflyboy5 said:
(since i have the money now, and if she says yes)
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it's very peculiar that you listed these two things in the order you did. I don't think I need to say anymore.

Touchy situation, but it happens. True colors. Stay if you want to stay, but realize what you're staying with.

People rarely change.
 
Firebird2XC said:
Almost like a right of passage, isn't it?
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Unfortunately for most it is. I got the I'm just spending time with him beacuse he reminded me of you.
Enjoy your deployment, your bros will pull you through, and will help beat the snot out of your "friend".
Semper Fi, for most it's just a phrase, for some it's a way of life.
 
sr22driver said:
Enjoy your deployment, your bros will pull you through, and will help beat the snot out of your "friend".
.
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Shouldn't that beating include her too....or primarily for that matter, if there's beatings to be dealt out? Unless the "friend" has a gun to her head, she still has the ability to do or not do anything.
 
MikeD said:
Shouldn't that beating include her too....or primarily for that matter, if there's beatings to be dealt out? Unless the "friend" has a gun to her head, she still has the ability to do or not do anything.
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Maybe more of a "verbal lashing" than a beating. But if a man's going to beat on someone, it should be another man - even if the one who done wronged him was a woman and it makes less sense to beat the man (if someone's going to get a beatin').
 
Trust me brother, let her go. I went through a very similar thing when I was in Afghanistan. I kept trying to turn a blind eye to the obvious signals. Instead of cutting her loose I wussed out and kept trying to make things work, reignite the spark. Big mistake. When I returned from over there she greeted me at the airport like I had only been gone for a week, almost like I was bothering her. I even moved across the country for her (even BIGGER mistake!!!) luckily I had enough friends beat things into me and came to my own realization on how miserable I was and finally got out. first year and a half together was great, the last year and a half was hell....gained weight and everything.

Trust me and the others, it sucks, but cut her off now...you don't want her to be in your welcome home reception when you come back with this hanging over you. Feel free to PM me if you need to talk about it, it's rough, I know.
 
1. I gave her a ring, a pre-engagement ring, promise ring, what ever you call it. And she wore it. We talked about marriage and all the things that go with it. She was all for it.

2. Im done with my buddy, when i get home he will look down on me with fear.

I gave her a chance and she pissed it away. So im done, its over. 4.5 years later. She wants to be friends, never gonna happen. So through the uprights she goes. Dropped like a hot potato. etc. Sucks, you cant just turn it off. I'm surrounded by my bros though. And the sun is going to rise today and tomorrow. I guess you get through it. Hard to believe though, gonna be tougher when i get home though, think i might stay out here awhile longer.
 
exerauflyboy5 said:
1. I gave her a ring, a pre-engagement ring, promise ring, what ever you call it. And she wore it. We talked about marriage and all the things that go with it. She was all for it.

2. Im done with my buddy, when i get home he will look down on me with fear.

I gave her a chance and she pissed it away. So im done, its over. 4.5 years later. She wants to be friends, never gonna happen. So through the uprights she goes. Dropped like a hot potato. etc. Sucks, you cant just turn it off. I'm surrounded by my bros though. And the sun is going to rise today and tomorrow. I guess you get through it. Hard to believe though, gonna be tougher when i get home though, think i might stay out here awhile longer.
Click to expand...

Remember, she needs to look at you in fear too, as she was suppsed to even more than a friend.

Then again, I wouldn't waste the time with either of them.

Why stay longer there? Do it if you want to, but realize you don't have to. Coming home and sampling the many other fish in the pond should be an option too!
 
Joke alert:

Joe's friend to Joe: Why are you crying and all upset?

Joe: It was 20 years ago today that I caught my wife and best friend cheating.

Joe's friend: Does it still bother you?

Joe: No, I just realized that if I would of shot them both I would be out of prison by now. :bandit:
 
calcapt said:
Joke alert:

Joe's friend to Joe: Why are you crying and all upset?

Joe: It was 20 years ago today that I caught my wife and best friend cheating.

Joe's friend: Does it still bother you?

Joe: No, I just realized that if I would of shot them both I would be out of prison by now. :bandit:
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Now THAT right there is funny! :D
 
MikeD said:
Remember, she needs to look at you in fear too, as she was suppsed to even more than a friend.

Then again, I wouldn't waste the time with either of them.

Why stay longer there? Do it if you want to, but realize you don't have to. Coming home and sampling the many other fish in the pond should be an option too!
Click to expand...

Yes!

That, travel, drinking (if you're into it), less Middle East...
 
exerauflyboy5 said:
1. I gave her a ring, a pre-engagement ring, promise ring, what ever you call it. And she wore it. We talked about marriage and all the things that go with it. She was all for it.

2. Im done with my buddy, when i get home he will look down on me with fear.

I gave her a chance and she pissed it away. So im done, its over. 4.5 years later. She wants to be friends, never gonna happen. So through the uprights she goes. Dropped like a hot potato. etc. Sucks, you cant just turn it off. I'm surrounded by my bros though. And the sun is going to rise today and tomorrow. I guess you get through it. Hard to believe though, gonna be tougher when i get home though, think i might stay out here awhile longer.
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Nah, just let it go..it's easier. Go home when you're supposed to, find another hotter girl so your "friend" will be jealous and you can give your ex a complex. :D
 
exerauflyboy5 said:
1. I gave her a ring, a pre-engagement ring, promise ring, what ever you call it. And she wore it. We talked about marriage and all the things that go with it. She was all for it.

2. Im done with my buddy, when i get home he will look down on me with fear.

I gave her a chance and she pissed it away. So im done, its over. 4.5 years later. She wants to be friends, never gonna happen. So through the uprights she goes. Dropped like a hot potato. etc. Sucks, you cant just turn it off. I'm surrounded by my bros though. And the sun is going to rise today and tomorrow. I guess you get through it. Hard to believe though, gonna be tougher when i get home though, think i might stay out here awhile longer.
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I went through a divorce during my second stint in Iraq a few years back.

First off- don't hold on to that anger indefinitely. It's toxic, and will do you no good. You have a right to it at present, but it will fade. Let it. Trust me on this one. Do NOT.. I repeat... DO NOT resort to violence. Not to others, not to yourself. This will only make matters worse.

Second- your 'bros' are the best thing you could ask for right now. When my marriage tanked, folks I barely knew came out of the woodwork to offer condolences and welcome me to the 'club'. People will emotionally shank each other in relationships, if so motivated. Deployments just force the issue. Don't be afraid to lean on some folks.

NOTE: I retract my previous statement about "pissing in her cheerios." Not constructive. I was not in the best state of mind when I wrote that. Very bad advice there.

Third- Grieve. There are stages. Look into it. There are some nice folks down at 'Combat Stress' that can help you do this constructively.

Fouth- Remember where you are. Keep your head. Don't repeat a mistake I made, however, and use that as an excuse to bottle and avoid fully facing the issue over time. A crutch is a crutch. Who walks on a crutch forever unless they have to? Do what it takes to heal.

Fifth- Attend to your other needs. Fresh air, sunlight, exercise, spending time with people.. these matter more than you know.

Six- Find something that makes you laugh. Trust me on this one.

If you need to vent brother, speak up in a PM or something.

This sucks. It doesn't have to suck forever. It feels like it might, but it won't.
 
Firebird2XC said:
NOTE: I retract my previous statement about "pissing in her cheerios." Not constructive. I was not in the best state of mind when I wrote that. Very bad advice there.
Click to expand...
I should say so. Otherwise, I think pissing in Cheerios would warrant digging a key into the side of his pretty little souped up 4 wheel drive, or carving a name into his leather seats!

Right now, he's done nothing to deserve it. But, once you pee in Cheerios, all bets are off. OFF!
 
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