Funny Passenger Announcements
- Thread starter Pilotforhire587
- Start date
Okie_Pilot
Pitts Builder
:beer: My kind of pilot. Lol!
I found this one funny when I heard it.. we were about 30 minutes early, so I was happy we were early.
"We apologize for our early arrival into XYZ. We shorted you 30 minutes of your 2 hour flight. We'll make those 30 minutes up on a future flight."
I did fly with a captain that routinely blocked in at the destination at the scheduled departure time for a particular flight (same time zone). I was just off IOE and still hanging on to the tailcone. He took care of reporting the out off on and ins...
"We apologize for our early arrival into XYZ. We shorted you 30 minutes of your 2 hour flight. We'll make those 30 minutes up on a future flight."
I did fly with a captain that routinely blocked in at the destination at the scheduled departure time for a particular flight (same time zone). I was just off IOE and still hanging on to the tailcone. He took care of reporting the out off on and ins...
jwp_145
GhostRider in the Sky
A buddy of mine was an FO at XJT(furloughed) and once while returning from Canada to the US he made a Borat-esque pax announcement of "Welcome to the U.S. and A... is very nice..."
Well the Senior Captain he was flying the trip with didn't like that in the least bit and he ended up getting a write-up over the deal!
Well the Senior Captain he was flying the trip with didn't like that in the least bit and he ended up getting a write-up over the deal!
dasleben
That's just, like, your opinion, man
There's always that 5% no matter where you go (the CA, not the FO). I know a guy who was written up by a random captain in the terminal for having a mustache that was slightly out of "regulation." My buddy was pulled into the CPO over it. Not cool, people.
fisher37
Well-Known Member
I did this the other night...
Me: Tower, do you have time for a light gun demonstration?
Tower (female controller): Sure, let me know when you're turning final.
Me: Tower, N1234S final 17.
Tower: Do you see the light?
Me: Negative.
Tower: Roger, cleared option 17
Me: Cleared Option 17 N1234S
(After the touch and go)
Me: Tower, can you flash me again?
Tower: Say again?
Me: Can you flash me again?....with the light gun?
I sure caught some crap after that one in the CFI lounge!
Me: Tower, do you have time for a light gun demonstration?
Tower (female controller): Sure, let me know when you're turning final.
Me: Tower, N1234S final 17.
Tower: Do you see the light?
Me: Negative.
Tower: Roger, cleared option 17
Me: Cleared Option 17 N1234S
(After the touch and go)
Me: Tower, can you flash me again?
Tower: Say again?
Me: Can you flash me again?....with the light gun?
I sure caught some crap after that one in the CFI lounge!
Firebird2XC
Well-Known Member
FA's have been looking for creative ways to get the attention of passengers for YEARS.
'Back in the Day', Mom worked for that red-tailed airline as a FA. They used to get flights full of business travelers who would sit down, fasten their seat belts, open their papers, then ignore the rest of the world completely.
Just to see if ANYBODY ever paid attention to the safety demo, they started taping Playboy centerfolds to the fold-out safety briefing cards they held up to show the cabin. They did this many times.
Nobody noticed. Not once. Ever.
That's it. I'm becoming an expat.
Nark
Macho Superpilot
I can assure you, the Philippines was a lot of fun. I want to say it was the most fun I had with my clothes on, but that wouldn't be the case...
I met one or two Cebu FA's. But they weren't the highlight of my government sponsored 8 week vacation.
Oh yeah back on topic:
A nervous looking pax:
Me: is this your first time in a small plane?
Them: Yes!
Me: Me too, at least your not alone.
Again
Me: Don't worry folks, I've seen this ton hundreds of times on TV, it can't be that hard.
As Cmill said, answering the same two questions over and over again gets really old, fast.
I met one or two Cebu FA's. But they weren't the highlight of my government sponsored 8 week vacation.
Oh yeah back on topic:
A nervous looking pax:
Me: is this your first time in a small plane?
Them: Yes!
Me: Me too, at least your not alone.
Again
Me: Don't worry folks, I've seen this ton hundreds of times on TV, it can't be that hard.
As Cmill said, answering the same two questions over and over again gets really old, fast.
Screaming_Emu
Well-Known Member
If we have a particularly long taxi (ie runway 10/28 in ATL) when asking the flight attendants to be seated I start with one of two things
"Hello from the flight deck, we hope you have enjoyed your tour of the Atlanta airport, but unfortunately they're telling us we have to leave"
or
"I promise you we aren't driving you all the way there...just mostly"
"Hello from the flight deck, we hope you have enjoyed your tour of the Atlanta airport, but unfortunately they're telling us we have to leave"
or
"I promise you we aren't driving you all the way there...just mostly"
Firebird2XC
Well-Known Member
I was doing seat belt checks in the 1900 one day and a nervous man tugged on my sleeve.
"Sir, are you sure this is safe? This airplane is so SMALL!"
I finally caved to my dark little voice in my head.
"I dunno. Probably not. I'm just trying to see how long I can keep it going."
Big as dinner plates, his eyes got. I then chuckled, apologized, and told him I was yanking his chain.
"Sir, are you sure this is safe? This airplane is so SMALL!"
I finally caved to my dark little voice in my head.
"I dunno. Probably not. I'm just trying to see how long I can keep it going."
Big as dinner plates, his eyes got. I then chuckled, apologized, and told him I was yanking his chain.
TravDK
Well-Known Member
Express Way Visual into LGA:
"folks as we approach new York today the people on the left should have a great view of the city. notice the statue of liberty and the empire state building. Those folks on the right side, look to your left and you can see the people on the left enjoying the great view. Flight attendant please prepare the cabin for arrival."
"folks as we approach new York today the people on the left should have a great view of the city. notice the statue of liberty and the empire state building. Those folks on the right side, look to your left and you can see the people on the left enjoying the great view. Flight attendant please prepare the cabin for arrival."
GreenDayPilot
Well-Known Member
Ooo, I've got a bunch of these.. here's a few...
1) After landing, tower told me to "contact ground on 121.8."
So I tried calling them, but I had forgotten to flip the frequency.
So tower says again, "Cessna 3AB, ground is 121.8"
I reply "sorry about that, 121.8, 3AB"
I try a second time, "Ground, Cessna 123AB Clear of 24, taxi to transient"
and he replies "CESSNA-1-2-3-A-B--GROUND-IS-1-2-1-POINT-8."
... I'm staring at my radios and it looks like everything is in its right place. A couple seconds go by and the controller goes, "gotcha!... 3AB, taxi to transient"
2) I accidentally called the pax when trying to reply to ATC... twice! I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who's done this..
3) When I was training JAL and ANA guys, we overheard one guy reply with "altitude" when asked to do so (i.e., "say altitude").. Again, I feel like they've heard this one before, haha.
4) One of my female students called in "...inbound with Victor." The female controller came back and asked, "Oooo, 'Victor,' is he cute?"
1) After landing, tower told me to "contact ground on 121.8."
So I tried calling them, but I had forgotten to flip the frequency.
So tower says again, "Cessna 3AB, ground is 121.8"
I reply "sorry about that, 121.8, 3AB"
I try a second time, "Ground, Cessna 123AB Clear of 24, taxi to transient"
and he replies "CESSNA-1-2-3-A-B--GROUND-IS-1-2-1-POINT-8."
... I'm staring at my radios and it looks like everything is in its right place. A couple seconds go by and the controller goes, "gotcha!... 3AB, taxi to transient"
2) I accidentally called the pax when trying to reply to ATC... twice! I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who's done this..
3) When I was training JAL and ANA guys, we overheard one guy reply with "altitude" when asked to do so (i.e., "say altitude").. Again, I feel like they've heard this one before, haha.
4) One of my female students called in "...inbound with Victor." The female controller came back and asked, "Oooo, 'Victor,' is he cute?"
sr22driver
what had happened was...
When I was instructing in P-Cola, Tower called and told us "maximum forward speed to the airport". Before I could respond my student repied with "LUDICROUS SPEED, GO". Pensacola's response was " Mooney XXXXS, have Dark Helmet call us when you're on the ground."