Cold Feet About First 121 Job

C

CulturalMotor

Well-Known Member
Good morning! Maybe I'm looking for a pep talk, but honestly, I just want a no "bullcrap" outside perspective if I should jump ship or stick it out:

I just completed initial sim training at my first ever airline gig. I was a prior CFI with no prior turbine experience. During training, I passed my MV and LOE first attempt, but I struggled tremendously and had to do several repeat lessons. I feel like my performance was marginal throughout training, even during the checkride, and now I'm have some serious jitters for IOE which will be coming up in a few days. I know people say IOE is fun, but for me, I feel like I'm still not safe.

Going through this training for the past 2 months has really taken a toll on my passion and interest for flying. I have contemplated resigning several times during training to do something else not in aviation field and have asked myself if I'll even enjoy the professional airline life. I want to be loyal to my airline because they invested so much in me, but as the title says, I'm having cold feet.
 
The fact that you’re worried is just a subconscious reminder that you need to keep studying and practicing to become proficient. Give yourself some time, no one is gonna be an expert in type right out of the box. Go and get 300-500 hours in type and you’ll probably become so familiar in the plane that you’ll never remember a time you weren’t. Use these first few months as a chance to correlate what you were taught in the school house with how the plane and the operation work. After a while you’ll physically become comfortable with the equipment and enough lightbulbs will go off in your head that it will all make sense. I remember getting to the hotel room after my first day on IOE and wondering how the hell anyone ever trusted me to fly a jet! Six months later I could practically fly the plane in my sleep. It just takes time.

As to the professional airline pilot life, honestly it’s what you make of it. Hell, you can take two pilots on the same fleet at the same airline and get wildly different views on what it’s even like! You can focus on the bad, and there is plenty to find if you look for it. Or you can focus on the good, which is in my view more abundant though I do often look at it through the lens of comparison to the over 15 years of corporate and customer service I did before flying.

Quitting is alway an option. Not everyone is cut out for this or any other job and if you hate it or it makes you miserable then by all means seek employment elsewhere. But I wouldn’t quit fresh out of training without giving it a try.
 
Between now and OE do everything in your power to ensure you are as prepared as possible. That’s really all you can do. Your job isn’t to decide when you’re ready, that’s on the line check airman. Be honest with them, but push yourself and be the best that you can be.

Under no circumstances should you quit until you’ve given yourself the time to get comfortable. Airline training is stressful, especially your first one. I’ve been an airline pilot for 16 years and counting and I still absolutely hate the training environment. Use that as drive to make yourself better. I never feel ready and even after 8 years at a regional I had to fight similar feelings as you when I was starting IOE on the 747 at my current airline. But you’ll push through, eventually you’ll be comfortable, and it’ll dawn on you that all the hard work has paid off.

This might not be for you, but don’t quit until you’re certain or you’ll always find yourself wondering what if. You’ve made it this far, it would be absolutely insane to quit this close to the goal line.

Keep us updated on how it goes!
 
I'd give it six months and re-evaluate. It's not easy to get where you are and there may be no second chances if you bail. That looks really bad on a resume. If corporate is more your thing, then you can say the airlines just didn't work for you, and it actually would be a good thing. But I hear you saying you doubt flying is the career for you. Think of how hard you worked and sacrificed to get where you are and how many would want to be in your shoes. I struggled in training, as well. Had to retake my Capts PC. I wanted to slither back to the right seat and be a professional F/O. Company treated me with kid gloves and the guy doing the retest was super cool. Ended up being no big deal. IOE was a breath of fresh air cause it was back to stuff you did every day, just flying the plane. My IOE guy was really encouraging and acted like I hadn't struggled in training at all, even though I told him and it was in my records. Did 16 years in the left seat after that and while I abhorred training it was very worth the effort and struggle to get there. Best of luck to you. I'd give it a while before I do anything rash.
 
Don't stress. By what I am reading from your post, you haven't flown a jet before, right? Just need some time for your brain to adjust to the rate of things happening, and eventually it will become second nature. I'm new to the airlines, but not jet aircraft. And even with that level of comfort, it was still a big learning experience going through initial training and IOE. I can't imagine how I would have felt if I was also trying to get used to flying a faster, more complex aircraft. Give yourself some credit, you got through the sims, and probably not unexpectedly, you needed a couple extra looks to get to where you needed to be. There is no shame in that. You'll be just fine. It probably just doesn't feel like it right now.
 
There is a cadence to 121 line ops. Things tend to happen at the same pace, and the same way every single time... it takes time to get the rhythm and to get used to the speed and pattern of that vs. the firehose of the schoolhouse.

Think of it like this: yes, your airline management is 'investing' in you during your training... but really? Are they? Or are they ensuring that the required boxes are checked in the most efficient/least cost way possible? Because, they have a business to run and you aren't out making money in the schoolhouse. (Now, not to say that the professionals and the instructors in the schoolhouse aren't invested in the program, trying to help you learn and make sure you succeed... but they are going through a syllabus and making sure that everything is getting done. Training is a 2-way street and no one has the time to spoonfeed the info to every student.)

Anyway, very cynical... I know. And, honestly, it's not the best system because of the hiring environment that we are in right now. (But, that's a 35,000 ft. view for another discussion...)

Here's the upside. This is now a one way street. It's up to you to keep learning, keep striving, keep working. I'm not gonna lie, it's probably gonna get worse before it gets better. The way to combat that is to continue to work hard, pay attention, stay ahead of the plane, and have some fun while you are at it. IOE is gonna be hard work. Your first few trips when released to the line are gonna be hard work. I don't know what carrier you have landed at but when you hit the line you are going to be exposed to a whole bunch of different personalities... some are going to be great and will embrace mentorship. Some aren't going to be interested at all. (Some will be pretty angry and may take it out on you.) It's gonna be a crap shoot. Listen... learn... most importantly... your job is to do your job. Remember your triggers, stay ahead of the plane. Then it's gonna get easier as you get off high-mins. Then winter is gonna hit and it's gonna get harder. But, it'll get easier... then you'll have 300-500-800 hours in the plane... summer will hit and well... you'll question every life choice you made up until now.

Then... the clouds will part and a Terry Gilliam inspired 2D graphic will announce that you are on 2nd year pay. Off probation. And you'll look back at this thread and well... I hope you'll think about paying it forward.

You are gonna be fine, it's just going to be a lot more work on top of the long days and the normal operational pressures. Every day it will get a little bit easier. It's going to be fun. Congrats, you just started the first step of the greatest career ever.
 
In some ways I was you about nine months ago.

I will send you a private message, but for now, focus on your fundamentals. Flows, callouts, triggers. Your IOE CAs will help you put it together.
 
Some excellent advice above and I have nothing to add. But don't give up. Adversity makes it all that much sweeter when you are successful. It's a great career. I remember my first jet type. It was brutally hard. My first year online I had no idea what I was doing but slowly I became more proficient. 13 years later this job is like wearing an old pair of gloves. It's worth the fight now.
 
Curious, what is this term "triggers" you guys are using? I assume it means some event that triggers a flow or checklist or some change, just haven't heard it used where I work.
 
CulturalMotor said:
Good morning! Maybe I'm looking for a pep talk, but honestly, I just want a no "bullcrap" outside perspective if I should jump ship or stick it out:

I just completed initial sim training at my first ever airline gig. I was a prior CFI with no prior turbine experience. During training, I passed my MV and LOE first attempt, but I struggled tremendously and had to do several repeat lessons. I feel like my performance was marginal throughout training, even during the checkride, and now I'm have some serious jitters for IOE which will be coming up in a few days. I know people say IOE is fun, but for me, I feel like I'm still not safe.

Going through this training for the past 2 months has really taken a toll on my passion and interest for flying. I have contemplated resigning several times during training to do something else not in aviation field and have asked myself if I'll even enjoy the professional airline life. I want to be loyal to my airline because they invested so much in me, but as the title says, I'm having cold feet.
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If you can get through the training and be signed off for the line then the job will just get easier. Reading your post I’m more concerned about the home/personal life aspects, because if you’ve got issues there then the flying will be a side issue.
 
///AMG said:
Curious, what is this term "triggers" you guys are using? I assume it means some event that triggers a flow or checklist or some change, just haven't heard it used where I work.
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Exactly that. Certain events trigger a flow for us.
 
///AMG said:
Curious, what is this term "triggers" you guys are using? I assume it means some event that triggers a flow or checklist or some change, just haven't heard it used where I work.
Click to expand...
Yeah, like the gate agent coming up with the reconciliation forms when boarding is complete might trigger the before push flow… that sort of thing.
 
Welcome to JC. You're a few months ahead of me. I don't have any advise but hope you stick around and share more of your experience. Sending good vibes your way!
 
Screaming_Emu said:
@CulturalMotor

How’d it go?
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I finished OE abut 3 weeks ago. Currently rotting in reserves not being used. Thanks for y'all's support and motivation! It really pushed me to continue. There were hard and stressful moments, but there were also moments where I was perfect. My LCPs and I boiled it down to my mentality. I hope my situation motivates others that are having currently having second thoughts like I did.
 
CulturalMotor said:
I finished OE abut 3 weeks ago. Currently rotting in reserves not being used. Thanks for y'all's support and motivation! It really pushed me to continue. There were hard and stressful moments, but there were also moments where I was perfect. My LCPs and I boiled it down to my mentality. I hope my situation motivates others that are having currently having second thoughts like I did.
Click to expand...

Congratulations. The really hard part is over. Now that you're rotting on reserve, do not let everything you learned go to waste.

For me, the best way to prevent that was to journal/log everything I learned from each flight, and then take my weak points and emphasize fixing them when I was reviewing SOPs and flows. I really, really suck at memorization in general so this was helpful to me.

I still use this kind of recursive technique to learn new things. It's a brute-force approach and it's probably not terribly efficient, but it works for me. I'd like to work smarter, but I'm not smart enough to work smarter, so harder it is.
 
killbilly said:
Congratulations. The really hard part is over. Now that you're rotting on reserve, do not let everything you learned go to waste.

For me, the best way to prevent that was to journal/log everything I learned from each flight, and then take my weak points and emphasize fixing them when I was reviewing SOPs and flows. I really, really suck at memorization in general so this was helpful to me.

I still use this kind of recursive technique to learn new things. It's a brute-force approach and it's probably not terribly efficient, but it works for me. I'd like to work smarter, but I'm not smart enough to work smarter, so harder it is.
Click to expand...
Very helpful methodology. After rotting 40+ days of rotting on reserves and not being assigned any flying since OE, I finally got a turn. Felt pretty rusty but glad I got the hours in nevertheless for a refresher.

Will try the brute -force approach and journaling my learning moments. Thanks for that and thanks again to all of yall! I know yall said the first couple months on line can be hard too, but yalls testimonies are of enormous encouragement to me. Like I said, I hope later down the road, I can provide a testimony of the same manner of encouragement for others.
 
CulturalMotor said:
Very helpful methodology. After rotting 40+ days of rotting on reserves and not being assigned any flying since OE, I finally got a turn. Felt pretty rusty but glad I got the hours in nevertheless for a refresher.

Will try the brute -force approach and journaling my learning moments. Thanks for that and thanks again to all of yall! I know yall said the first couple months on line can be hard too, but yalls testimonies are of enormous encouragement to me. Like I said, I hope later down the road, I can provide a testimony of the same manner of encouragement for others.
Click to expand...

Keep on keeping on! Sticking around and helping others that follow behind you is what this place is all about!
 
CulturalMotor said:
Very helpful methodology. After rotting 40+ days of rotting on reserves and not being assigned any flying since OE, I finally got a turn. Felt pretty rusty but glad I got the hours in nevertheless for a refresher.

Will try the brute -force approach and journaling my learning moments. Thanks for that and thanks again to all of yall! I know yall said the first couple months on line can be hard too, but yalls testimonies are of enormous encouragement to me. Like I said, I hope later down the road, I can provide a testimony of the same manner of encouragement for others.
Click to expand...

Hell yeah, glad you finished and are out on the line. Don't worry, it gets better. Actually, a lot better, even pretty fast, from standing short call or something and just sitting at home during quiet months. Glad you stuck with it!
 
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