In all seriousness, if you are considering Mesa for the PHX base here are some key things to consider.
You won't be able to get PHX as an FO out of training. It will take about 6 months to a year before you can probably get assigned PHX as a base. You will likely be commuting PHX to DFW with the lowest nonrev priority on AA.
You will NEVER be able to upgrade to Captain in PHX. All of the PHX CAs are lifers who will retire from Mesa. Seriously, it will take at least 10 years to be a PHX based CA.
Mesa's first year pay is half of the industry average.
I went to Mesa 2 years ago when their pay wasn't far from industry average, and the opportunity to be based in DFW, close to home, was worth it. Today, I would go almost anywhere else.