Officer Fitness reports - translated

mjg407

Well-Known Member
Average Officer = Not too Bright
Active Socially = Drinks Heavily
Wife is Active Socially = She Drinks Too
Character and Integrity Above Reproach = Still one step ahead of the Law
Zealous Attitude = Opinionated
Eager to Fly = Log Head
Unlimited Potential = Will Retire as CDR
Exceptional Flying Ability = Has Equal Number of Takeoffs and Landings
Takes advantage of every opportunity to Progress = Buys Drinks for the C.O. and X.O.
Outstanding = Frequently in the rain
Indifferent to Instruction = Knows more than his seniors
Stern Disciplinarian = A Bastard
Tactful in Dealing with Superiors = Knows when to keep his mouth shut
Approaches difficult problems with zeal = Finds someone else to do the job
A keen analyst = Thoroughly confused
Definitely not the desk type = Did not go to college
Expresses himself well = Speaks English
Often spends extra hours on the job = Miserable home life
A true Southern gentleman = Hillbilly
Conscientious and Careful = Scared
Demonstrates high qualities of Leadership = Has a Loud Voice
Judgement is Usually Sound = Lucky
Maintains professional attitude = A snob
Keen sense of humor = Has vast reportoire of dirty jokes
Career Minded = Hates Reserves
Slightly Below Average = Stupid
A very fine officer of great value to the service = Gets to work on time
 

mjg407

Well-Known Member
Some of my favorite things to do on FITREPS (OPR) was:
1. When one of the 0-2/3s handed me a PoS I would take it from there and "liven" his report on up.
2. Use words (from the word thesaurus add on) that could only be defined by words I knew my XO didn't know. Stopped him from ever saying that the only people to read the report were the originator and himself.....
 
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