How would you handle this?

captainphil

captainphil

Well-Known Member
Yesterday I took up my friend for a flight who has already soloed. He however has a problem with feeling like things have to be done his way. And when it doesn't go his way he feels like its a personal attack against him. For instance, yesterday we were flying to Gabreski and he was telling me to turn to base sooner, I explained to him that I want to give myself more room for the guy on the final. When we go flying I want him to give me his opinions because they could help me out but sometimes I feel like he thinks he would like to be the one in command( He is in the ROTC, I don't know if it stems from this). I politely let him know that as a certificate holder, I am responsible for my safety as well as his , and that as long as he is flying with me as a front seat passenger, he will need to let me do my duty as PIC. What would you have said? Another thing that h e did was he tried stopping me from giving him a briefing before engine start. I know the FAR's say as long as the person is familiar with the aircraft they dont need to give the brieing, but he's flying a cessna and im flying a warrior so I always give the briefing to him as well as anyone on board. I tell him if you want to fly with me, your going to have to listen to this brieifing because it may save your life. WOuld you have said these things to him? I dont want to sound rude telling him these things but after all we are taking about safety and my responsibilty as PIC.
 
Tell him to sit down, shut up and listen if he wants to fly with you at all! If he can't respect that, then tell him he won't be welcome flying with you again.

There's no reason for such Type A, demanding behavior, especially at the PPL level. He's acting like one of those old skool airline captains before the days of CRM.... and that's NOT a compliment.
 
i would just flash my cert. and say "I dont take much stock in what you say becasue last time i checked, Im the pilot..." that will shut him up. Good job about being tactful though. Shows professionalism.
 
MQAAord said:
There's no reason for such Type A, demanding behavior, especially at the PPL level. He's acting like one of those old skool airline captains before the days of CRM.... and that's NOT a compliment.
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:yeahthat:


Even though he is the one coming off as demanding, don't just throw it back at him like a jerk. Be a professional and set an example.

You might also want to take some time to explain why you were doing certain things that he didn't agree with.
 
No offense to anyone in the ROTC but he is in the ROTC and feels like he is a marine. He even argues that the army is stronger than t he marines ( which im not saying they are or arent) and that he knows everything about it and not to make fun of the ROTC, which I don't but he feels so strongly about it that he gets easily offended whenver me or anyone says anything about the ROTC that doesnt tickle his fancy.that's the kind of mentality he has but I cant judge someone for how they feel about something, but when it comes to flying, until he gets his certificate, he can't really tell me how im supposed to fly the airplane. I would however appreciate suggestions he has to offer, but not full demand over how im supposed to fly the airplane. Oh and PS, I flew with him as a back seat passenger with his instructor and he gets nervous behind the controls sometimes, so would I trust someone who is that afraid of a stall? Not really but I am friends with him and I dont want to be rude.
 
Does he respect his instructor? (Listening to him, doing what the instructor says, etc without talking back & making demands?)

This guy sounds like a Human Factors training example in the making...
 
Since your the cert holder and listing all these issues about your friend why bother flying with him? If you have this many issues with the guy why on earth waste your time flying with him if he is not going to put safety first? Not to sound harsh, but make a command decision and don't fly with him if he has lower standards than you.
 
Honestly, sounds like you two have a penis measuring contest going on. He gets nervous doing stalls...so what? He's a student pilot. Even commercial pilots have a tendency to not be all that comfortable with stalling with the threat of spinning looming in the background.

Here's my advice: you two shouldn't fly together. Y'all's jockeying for alpha status in the cockpit could lead to distraction and unsafe flying. If he's that annoying to have along with you, why would you want to take him up again anyway?
 
Tell him to knock the chip off of his shoulder and shush! or......

MidlifeFlyer said:
Open the door and...
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if that doesnt work, calmly and professionaly remind him who is PIC and advise him to read 91.3 (with particular emphasis on the words 'final authority') and also educate himself a little about hazardous attitudes. Seems like he is compensating for his insecurity about his lack of experience or skill. Also sounds like he has a lot to learn about more than just flying....and if he's going to get into a pissing match about army vs. marines, tell him to suck it and the navy beats them both ........give me a break, I mean, c'mon, really???... (insert exasperated sigh here)....I just wouldnt fly with him if he keeps it up.
 
blaise723 said:
Honestly, sounds like you two have a penis measuring contest going on. He gets nervous doing stalls...so what? He's a studen pilot. Even commercial pilots have a tendency to not be all that comfortable with stalling with the threat of spinning looming in the background.

Here's my advice: you two shouldn't fly together. Y'all's jockeying for alpha status in the cockpit could lead to distraction and unsafe flying. If he's that annoying to have along with you, why would you want to take him up again anyway?
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Exactly right. You need to grow a pair and act like you're the pilot. If he has something important to say (such as pointing out traffic) great, however if he is going to sit up there and tell you when to turn base just ignore it. You are making the situation much bigger than it should be because you respond to him every time. Why do you let that bother you? Also, why are you riding along on his lesson? Perhaps it was you making him nervous, not the stalls.
 
One of the most important things I've learned over the years is how to handle disagreements, especially how to handle them in aviation. Use of tact can mean you get that job you really need 20 years from now. Your friend's lack of tact is a sign he has not learned how to handle disagreements. Best thing to do IMO, is handle them on the ground with him until you two can get a handle on it. The last thing either of you need is a wrestling match inflight.
 
I agree with you all, this attitude is not acceptable. I take him flying to return the favor for all of the times he's taken me up as a backseat passenger. I think its an ego thing, but we all know how that goes, ego+aviation= channel 12 news. I think his instructor should be the one to teach him hazardous attitudes and once he does that would I ever let him sit up front with me again and not put him with the bags :)
 
captainphil said:
No offense to anyone in the ROTC but he is in the ROTC and feels like he is a marine. He even argues that the army is stronger than t he marines ( which im not saying they are or arent) and that he knows everything about it and not to make fun of the ROTC, which I don't but he feels so strongly about it that he gets easily offended whenver me or anyone says anything about the ROTC that doesnt tickle his fancy.that's the kind of mentality he has but I cant judge someone for how they feel about something, but when it comes to flying, until he gets his certificate, he can't really tell me how im supposed to fly the airplane. I would however appreciate suggestions he has to offer, but not full demand over how im supposed to fly the airplane. Oh and PS, I flew with him as a back seat passenger with his instructor and he gets nervous behind the controls sometimes, so would I trust someone who is that afraid of a stall? Not really but I am friends with him and I dont want to be rude.
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No offense man but I think you are taking this guy way too seriously and his opinion is pretty close to worthless with no certificate.
 
don't have him fly with you. problem solved.

However, you do ask what could be done - What you have already said is quite acceptable. He;s not a certified pilot yet.

Ensure that he understands taking the controls under your command is a privilidge, not a right and that your authority in the cockpit is the final authority. Ask if he can accept that, then if not, let him observe rather than fly.
 
One acronym:

PIC

Now if he wants to call out traffic, take his opinion, but other than that, if you're PIC, let him know.

RD
 
Tld said:
Tell him to knock the chip off of his shoulder and shush! or......



if that doesnt work, calmly and professionaly remind him who is PIC and advise him to read 91.3 (with particular emphasis on the words 'final authority') and also educate himself a little about hazardous attitudes. Seems like he is compensating for his insecurity about his lack of experience or skill. Also sounds like he has a lot to learn about more than just flying....and if he's going to get into a pissing match about army vs. marines, tell him to suck it and the navy beats them both ........give me a break, I mean, c'mon, really???... (insert exasperated sigh here)....I just wouldnt fly with him if he keeps it up.
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:yeahthat: What she said.
If that does not work, calmly reach over, smile and beat the living crap out of him. ;) The simple fix is to refuse flying with him/ her.
 
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